Only You (Previously "Finding Myself")

Chapter 7

Next morning

**********Liam’s POV***********

It’s 10 in the morning and I slept like a baby. Louis is still in bed and I’m in the kitchen getting coffee. I’m glad things between us are back to normal. I feel emotionally revived from the conversation we had last night. I take a sip of my coffee as Harry walks into the kitchen looking tired as ever. 

"You alright mate?" He gives me that look you would get from a twelve year old boy who has had enough. Harry sits down and looks at me once more through his eyelashes. “Well Mr.Grumpy pants, are you gonna tell me or not?"

"Have you ever been with drunk Niall?" He runs his hands through his hair.

"Oh. Yeah. What did he do?" I really want to know because Niall isn’t always as difficult as Harry is making it seem. 

"I’m sorry Liam can we not talk about it right now? He said things and I just need to think. Alright?"

"Okie dokie…" Well now I have two things to talk about with Niall.

I knock on Nialls door, not even bothering to let him answer before I enter. He’s laying face down on his bed. I can tell he’s not asleep because I can hear him quietly screaming in his pillow. “Ni? Can I talk to you?" He looks up, face becoming less tense as he sees me. “Do you think you could tell me what happened that night? You know… with you and Louis?"

I see him tense up a bit before he swallows hard. His adams apple moves fast against his throat.

"Look Liam, I think you should sit down." I take a seat beside him on the soft bed. “Well I guess I should start from the beginning." Niall doesn’t dare to look my way as he tells his story.

"Liam, I was confused... about my sexuality. I kissed Louis and I'm sorry you had to see it but it didn't mean anything. I just needed to know if I liked boys. I asked him to kiss me. I don't like Louis in that way, and he doesn't feel that way towards me either. We were just curious, and got a little too into it. And before you get all freaked out I wasn't questioning my feelings about you. It was um... someone else. I really want you to know that what you saw meant nothing and I don't think I'm gay. I only like one boy." he takes a deep breath and I pat my best friends back, rubbing in a soft circular motion to help calm him down.

"Niall, would you mind telling me who this boy is? The one you like."

He inhales and holds it in for a few seconds before sighing deeply.

"Harry."

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"What?!" I wear a shocked expression on my face. Niall, Niall James Horan, likes Harry? WHAT. I look at the smaller boy to see his eyes shut tight. "Niall I'm not judging you but holy shit! I had no idea!" He looks up a little bit more calm. "Let me tell you, you're really good at hiding your feelings." Unlike me.

"Well, not exactly."

"What do you mean, Ni?"

"I may or may not have told Harry I liked him while I was drunk last night. And I'm steering more toward the direction that I did tell him." I hear him sniffle and watch him as his head hangs low.

"Oh Niall," you can hear the sympathy in my voice. "I'm so sorry he found out that way."

"It's fine I guess. He was bound to find out sometime, right?" I feel so bad for the lad.

"I guess so Niall, but still." Maybe if I told him about Louis? Maybe that could make him feel better? I don't know. I can be helpful, but I've never been in this kind of situation.

"Liam?"

"Yeah Ni?"

"Why were you so upset about Louis and me... kissing? I mean I understand why you would be a little mad, me not telling you and all... but why did you take it the way you did?" I guess I should tell him. He is my best friend after all, and he did just pour his heart out to me.

"Niall, the thing is I'm gay." he looks at me with the most confused expression. "Yeah I know. And it's nothing like you and Harry. I'm just not attracted to girls anymore... in that way. Yeah they're nice and all, but I'm into fellas. And specifically... Louis. Niall. I love Louis. And I don't know what to do about it." He says nothing, and he doesn't need to. What he does means much more to me than words. He hugs me. He accepts me. And that's the most comforting thing he could've done.

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A/N: Sorry it was short but I posted two in one night sooo it's all good yeah?

tell me what you think! i really need opinions from my readers... see what you guys think.

anyways, i'll try to post tomorrow.

p.s. does anyone else's heart hurt? or is it just me?

Ily

-Molly

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