Hayes Grier Imagines

The final goodbye

I walked down to Hayes's house for the final time. I stared at his house. I'm going to miss it here. Our sleep overs, and when we'd play nurf guns outside. That was before.

I knocked on the front door slowly. Hayes answered. He looked at me, and I could tell he knew.

"This is it huh?" He asked tearing up

I grabbed him into a tight hug and started crying to myself.

"No, this isn't it. I love you." I said wiping my tears as I let go.

"Why does cancer have to be a bitch?Hayes asked with a soft chuckle.

"I don't know." I said.

"C-can we just spend a few more hours together? I want them with you." I asked.

"Of course." He said.

We went in his room and watched movies like normal. Like I wasn't about to die in less than a few hours.

I have stage 5 cancer. That's incurable and very painful. My family, Hayes and I agreed to get it over with. I would be in pain for many years until it was time. I didn't want that.

It was almost one in the morning when I woke up in Hayes's arm. I looked at him. He's going to find someone new, and I'll be 6 feet underground. I feel a sting of jealousy in my heart. I hate that I do, I'm so selfish.

I got out of Hayes's grasp and kissed his forehead. I quietly reached into his dresser and got one of his hoodies. Just one last time. I look at him one last time.

"I love you Hayes." I whispered.

I walked out of the house bawling. I fell to the ground because I was crying so hard. I'm never going to see him again. I'm not scared of death. I could honestly not give a shit that I'm about to die, just the fact I won't be able to feel him anymore, or even smell him. That's what kills me.

I finally reached home and changed into Hayes's hoodie. I wrote letters to my friends and family and Hayes.

Then I hopped on top of the roof and layed there, waiting for death to claim me. I looked up at the stars. I'll be one of the stars in a few minutes. I took a deep breath and prayed to God. Praying that he'll let Hayes find a girl who will love him as much as I did, and he'll be happy.

I started to get a bit sleepy but moments ago I was just wide awake. Here it is. Death. Right in front of me. Holding its hand out for me to grasp the it. Death is simple. Your heart stops and it's over, your done. But when people around you die, that's the hard part. Knowing that they're gone. And your still here. And honestly I'm not sure who's going to really die, me or Hayes. I looked at the stars one last time.

I looked at my watch. "Time of death, 2:02am."

I took a deep breath.
"I'm ready." I whispered closing my eyes.

I could feel the nerves in my body shut down moving upward from my feet, legs, arms..and then my heart. And with that I was submerged into darkness followed by a bright light. And I was done.

*Hayes POV
I woke up around 6 am with my mother standing in the doorway looking at me with tears in her eyes. I knew. She,she was gone. I sat up and hugged my knees. My whole body hurts. My mother rushed and hugged he. We sat there crying on my bed. I knew she was sad, but I was in pain.

Actual pain. My heart feels like 10 million weights in sitting on it. My whole body is shaking like its -20 degrees outside. I don't think I can take this. I'll never find anyone like her again. Ever. When she said her final goodbye, I died inside. But this-this was worse.

IM LITERALLY IN TEARS RN. OH MY GOD!! I don't like this. 😭😭