Even Fat Girls need love.

Inevitable Truth

"Hayden, I'm really sorry," I whispered.

"You lied to me. That's pretty fucking great. You don't realize, you don't know shit about me." He turned around quickly making me bump into him. I looked up at him. His hazel eyes told me everything. He wasn't sad or disappointed by me, was pissed off, and scared. Scared I would go to deep and kill myself. As if I hadn't already thought about it.

"I'm not gonna kill myself," I whispered in a small voice. He caught me in the park. 

"We both know you're lying. And maybe all you are is a liar." He said, a deathly glint in his eye. A tear slid down my face.

"How could you say that?" I asked, my voice breaking. "Plus here you fucking are. In the park, probably going to do exactly what I just did. Huh?" I say coldly, the trace of tears disappearing. 

"God Emily, way to fucking go. You guessed it." He said, pulling out the blade. He lifted his sleeve and pushed the blade right into it right in front of me. "Does this make you feel better?" He asked as he repeated the action, a gasp escaping his lips. 

"No, stop please!" I screamed running towards him. I took the blade from him. "I'm sorry, believe me, or not," I said, letting every emotion show through my eyes. Only for a second before I vanished them all. "I'm fine. I promise," I say softly before walking away with his bloody blade. As soon as I turned and began walking away I fell apart. I let the tears fall freely, as I made my way to my car. I slid down the side, and I shoved my face in my hands. I couldn't help it, I let the sobs out, and before I knew it someone was at my side, pulling me into their chest. It was Hayden, his spicy smell gave him away. 

"I'm sorry baby girl. It's all my fault." He said in my ear. I felt something wet hit my shoulder. I looked up, he was crying.

"Don't waste tears on me," I said. He looked at me and laughed. It wasn't real. I'm not stupid. At least not about faking shit.

"You're so stupid." He said, laughing again. "I hate this. You're so cute, and I can't do anything about it." He said, looking me straight in the eye. "I like you. I like you a lot. And you hate me. You hate me so much, huh? I tried saving you, and you hated it, you think I don't notice, but I do."

"I don't hate you, I just don't want to be saved. I'm okay, I'm just going through a rough time. It sucks."

"Then let me see your arm." I looked away.

"Tell me something no one knows about you," I whisper.

"I lost someone very special to me because they took their own life." He said, looking anywhere but at me.

"I'm sorry. Is that why you're so worried about me?"

"Emily, you're beautiful, you're amazing. You're everything I want in a woman. And I will always worry about you."

"What do people say to you? That hurts you?" I said, pulling out my arm for him to see.

"Too many names to list, baby girl," he whispered.

"Try me," I whisper back. 

"They call me gay, faggot, man whore, which I'm not. I'm straight and a virgin. Although, I am stupid and ugly which they also call me. I wish I could die or kill yourself. I want to escape the pain, Em. I want to so fucking bad." I could hear the true pain in his voice.

"Hayden, you're handsome, smart, and amazing. You shouldn't believe those idiots. You're everything I want in a man." I said holding on to him.

"Believe me, and I'll believe you." I stopped on the spot.

"That's not fair and you know it."

"I know, but you have to because I'm not lying."

"I wish I could believe you, but it's just not something I can do..." I whisper with pain. 

"I know." He said, leaning over and kissing my cheek before walking off to his car, leaving me speechless.

How can he leave after all we've said?