Having Harry's Baby

Strange

Once we arrived at our destination, Harry slid my door open for me and I climbed out.
"We all live here when we're not on tour," Harry explain when he saw me taking in my surroundings.
The house where we'd arrived was fairly big and private. Harry walked alongside me to the door, where we stopped behind Zayn as he unlocked it and let us in. We followed him into the wide kitchen, the smell of raw chicken hitting my nostrils instantly. The scent was revolting, and it took just about everything I had to not gag right then and there.
The woman behind the counter island in the center looked young and beautiful. Her hair fell in long, wavy tendrils down her back and her eyes were a stunning shade of green. They crinkled a little at the corners when she smiled as we walked in.
Zayn greeted her with a sweet kiss, his hands framing her small face. She was much smaller than he, but they looked like an ideal couple anyhow.
"Harry," she said, her smile widening at the sight of him. "Come here."
And he did, allowing her to wrap her small arms around him. He hugged her back with his good arm, his head resting on hers. "Hey, pretty lady. What're you cooking there?"
Riley laughed. "Chicken and rice. I'm going to sauté some vegetables. Never mind that though. How are you? And who's the other pretty lady you brought with you?" She asked, her face inclined up to see him and her eyebrows doing a little dance.
Harry laughed nervously. "We're okay. Just a little sore, I guess. And that's Hazel Porter," was all he said.
I'm only Hazel Porter.
She pulled away from Harry and came around to hug me. She caught me by surprise, but I hugged her back, the smell of her hair was ten steps up from the smell of raw chicken. "It's great to meet you. My name is Riley."
"I've heard. You're Zayn's wife," I said stupidly.
She smiled at that. "Luckily, yes, I am."
Zayn hugged Riley to his side, his arms locking her in place as he kissed her. "I think I'm the lucky one."
I tried to seem as least uncomfortable as I could, but I doubted that I looked very normal. I wasn't used to being around that kind of affection, the one that they had. Zayn and Riley connected like people who loved each other connected. They cared about each other, clearly, more than I'd ever cared about anybody in my life. Having been alone for so long, I never created bonds like the one they had. I didn't know how to act around them.
I let my head drop, my eyes scanning the ground. I wanted to retreat and sink into the ground all at once, not to mention the nausea I was feeling since I walked into the kitchen.
Harry stood a few steps behind me and leaned in to whisper in my ear. "I want you to meet some people," he tells me, making me jump a little in surprise when he took my hand in his.
I looked over to him and nodded. I hadn't realized there were others in the house. Harry led me out of the kitchen, telling Riley and Zayn that we'd be back soon. I tried to remove my hand from his, but his hold was strong.
We walked into the next room over, one filled with all sorts of different sofas and a television set. It was turned on a channel for children. That's when I noticed the two little ones in front of it, one sitting in a little chair, strapped in, and the other on the ground. The one in the seat was still fairly small, probably unable to sit straight on his own. The other was maybe a year older or less, playing with a set of blocks before him.
Harry motioned me forward, but I felt glued to my spot. Babies. Harry wants me to see the babies.
He leaned down to pick up the older one with a little difficulty, considering his arm. "Hey, buddy. Hey," he laughed when the baby did, his cheeks a little chubbier when he laughed. Harry looked over to me, motioning again with his head that I should join him. When I didn't, he walked over to me.
I felt paralyzed, my entire body going absolutely rigid. This is a child. A living thing that depends entirely on others. Like mine would be. Mine. I'm carrying a baby, as real as the one in Harry's arms.
"Hazel, meet Nathan," he said, smiling from ear to ear.
I couldn't keep my eyes from the child in Harry's arms. "Hi," was all I could manage.
Nathan turned in Harry's arms and looked straight at me. At first I thought he was going to cry, but then he extended his little arms toward me.
What the hell do I do?
"Go on," Harry coaxed gently, his voice soothing me.
The baby held his arms out for me still. I slowly worked up the courage to reach back. "What do I do?" I asked Harry.
He turned Nathan toward me and held him out. "Take him. Put your hands under mine and hold him."
I, terrified and shaking, slid my hands under Harry's just as he'd said, and pulled the baby to my body, automatically feeling his warmth against my chest and shoulder. He played with my hair carefully, as if he knew that pulling too hard would hurt me.
My eyes stayed glued on him, seeing the way that he moved and laughed all on his own for no particular reason. None that I knew, anyway.
This is what it will be like. I smiled, feeling a little out of place, and then handed Nathan back to Harry. I didn't want him to see the uncertainty or the tears in my eyes. I sat carefully, trying not to bring any attention to myself.
Harry set Nathan back on the ground next to his toys and then sat next to me. "Nathan happened just the same was as our baby happened. Everything turned out okay. Sebastian wasn't planned, either," he told me.
I didn't know why he was saying this, but I nodded anyway. It didn't make me feel much better, honestly.
I heard Zayn approach before I saw him. He sat on the sofa opposite ours and looked straight at us. "Well, seeing as you've said nothing, I suppose I will."
Harry and I looked back at him, confused.
"Riley's been pregnant twice. I think I know now how to recognize..." He sighed. "When you walked in, Hazel, and smelled the chicken. The way you, Harry, have been acting so strange lately. I watched you with Nathan."
Harry's hand squeezed mine. I didn't know whether it was to comfort me or himself. "I was going to tell you."
Zayn nodded, his eyes soft as they looked at me. "Congratulations, dear."
I let out a long breath.
Harry spoke again. "How do we get through this, Zayn?"