Glee: Race to the Finish (the fifth book in the Glee series)

Chapter 38: Unhinged

"No, I understand it," Stefan told her. "I want them to find Bree so badly but statistics show that..." His voice cracked and he took a deep breath to say, "I thought I'd come here for some comfort from Shea but she's acting like I'm on vacation. I guess she didn't really understand my relationship with Bree and how much she means to me. And she's trying to distract me but I didn't come to be distracted. I came to have someone different to talk about but I guess she's too different. Maybe I should've stayed in Lima and kept pretending the long-distance thing was working."

Julie put a hand on his shoulder and leaned against it. "I'm sorry," she told him. "But maybe you can go talk to her when she has free time and work things out."

"Maybe," Stefan agreed, though inside he knew the higher chance was that he'd return to Ohio single.

"I have to keep working on this song for Santana," Julie told him, "but when I'm done with that I'll go join you out there, ok?"

Stefan nodded and stood up. He understood now that Julie hadn't come here just out of malice and a need to abandon those who loved her. She was working and making sure she didn't come unhinged. 

He waved goodbye lazily and made his way out of her dressing room. There were tons of people around working and preparing for the night's concert. Passing all of them on his way to Shea just reinforced the idea that he didn't belong.

["When We Were On Fire (The Dark of the Morning Version)" by James Bay.]

Stefan: Drifting apart, getting harder to hold you. Days getting dark and the nights are growing cold. Are we burning out? Swept out of sight, rolling up on an ocean. Let's cut all the ropes and get lost in the moment. If our hearts are alive, maybe then they might. Send us back to the sun.

He made his way back to the main floor and felt so small. Santana was on the stage holding a microphone as she danced. Behind her, Shea and Brittany beautifully complimented her in the routine. Meanwhile he was down below with all of the crew members who'd never get their names up in lights either.

Stefan: Now I know, I know. That we're losing light, our love is dying. Out cold on the floor. Like a fallen star that shines no more. Take, take me back to where it was before. When we were on fire, fire...

He stood back and tried not to attract any attention as he sang there, hopelessly coming up with the words he was going to say. What happened to Sam had spooked him but what was currently going on with Bree made him come to a realization.

Stefan: Oh, oh, whoa, oh, whoa-oh-oh, now don't tell me no. That we're burning down. Oh, oh, whoa, oh, whoa-oh-oh, now don't tell me no. That we're burning now.

Life was short. Life wasn't going to wait around for him and he had to push forward. He wasn't playing any major games but the sport kept him away from his friends a lot. What little time he had now, he used it catching up with Shea, the beautiful girl who had just gone the distance a little to much.

Stefan: I know, I know we're losing light and our love is dying... Take me, take me home. Back to where we was before when we were on fire, fire...

And as he watched her do what she was best at—what she loved to do—he knew it was never going to work out. As much as he loved the girl, she wasn't the one he would want to be with if the next day his world was ending.

Stefan: And I know, I know that we're losing light, our love is dying. Out cold on the floor like a fallen star that shines no more. Take, take me back to where it was before when we were on fire, fire. When we were on fire, fire.