DAN
"hey, phil. i know we're friends and all but could you put some clothes on. you just told me about everything with only towels on."
"hey, dan. i know we're friends and all but could you never remind me that we spoke with only one of us wearing clothes." phil says mimicking my voice.
i wink at him. "never gonna happen, daffodil. or should i say, daffoPHIL."
"please leave my house. you're no longer welcome here. i could let you outside, you being transported via trash bag if you'd like."
"ew you sicko. i'm not leaving via my long lost twin. you're so despicable."
"yep...despicable me."
"i always knew you loved minions, phil."
"oh yeah. minion yaoi is my fave. those pill-shaped bodies, that sweet shade of yellow, and those outfits." phil looks over to me. "what about you, dan?"
"oh, i'm more of a shrek guy myself."
"makes sense, bottom boy."
"what the fuck. i'm a hetero male. i like le ladies."
"sure thing, all the homo howell." phil gets clothes from his closet and leaves the room.
YOU ARE READING
unknown number | phan
Fanfictionphil lester and friends thought it would be fun to text random numbers from the phone book. he never expected to make a brand new friend. *lowkey hate my writing in this but i think the sequel is a lil better*
