I hate it, i hate it so much. Life is just so unfair. If there really was a God up there, why is he doing this? Why is he letting simple mundanes feel so much pain?
I keep waiting and waiting and waiting for things to get better but they don't. Bad things keep happening one after another and i just can't handle it anymore. Josh's death didn't affect me at first but now, i'm just losing hope. I thought things would get better but Josh's death just proved me otherwise. Ripley was a really happy person before his death. Despite her difficult attitude, she was innocent. Now, she's changed. She isn't the girl who smiles all the time and put effort into all her outfits and makeup and hair,now she just throws on a pair of sneakers and throws on sweaters two sizes too big for me. Her hair was messy all the time and she would go to school looking like she hasn't slept for days.
Seeing her turning into that was too painful. She used to be so happy. I'd rather she bully me and spread rumors about me with a smile on her face all the time than see her fading away. She looked like she lost a lot of weight. Her chest bone sticks out, her cheeks sunken, the space between her thighs a mile wide.
The worst part is, she was turning into me. Why would God let Ripley turn into this? Why would he let her have so much pain and suffering.
