Sing

Chapter 10

I can't open my eyes, but I am conscious now. I don't know what happened. All I remember is hearing my father, then nothing, then beeping in my ear.
"Why can't I open my eyes," I mumble. I feel a papery texture when I move, and I realize I'm in a hospital bed.
"Oh, honey," a voice from behind me replies, "you fainted after your heart pumped to fast and your stomach got to tight. Here-" the voice pauses, I hear scuffing across the floor and my eyes open to a bright light "-there you are, better?"
"Yeah, thank you." It's a man, though I thought it was a women. The man walks back over to a pad at the end of the bed and starts to write something down.
"How are you?"
"I'm tired, and I'm in the hospital. But, you know, other than that good stuff I'm alright."
"Okay, what is your full name?"
"Vivian Ellen Kenders."
"Good," he says.
After flooding my weary head with a million questions, he finally relaxes his hand, "And do you want your family to come in now?"
I hesitate, "Can I just see my dad?"
"Of course," he says, walking out the door and shutting it carefully. I lift my head and scan the room:
There is an IV in my arm, a breathalyzer around my nose and mouth, making my voice sound muffled. And there is a clip on my finger, measuring my pulse.
I don't see a clock, so I don't know how long I'd been out. So I sit in the room and wait for my dad.
The door flies open, startling me and making my pulse monitor surge.
"Oh, no no no," my dad comes and sits in the chair next to me, stroking my hand and shushing the monitor.
"Dad, it's alright-"
"No, it's not. I didn't get to you in time and now you are here."
I purse my lips, "What time is it?"
"5:17," the doctor blurts from the corner.
My dad lowered his eyes from me and brings them back up to meet my concerned gaze, "You'll be released in about a half hour, you just...had a little trouble controlling your anxiety attack, is all-"
"And, if I may, how often does this happen?" The doctor steps forward, titling his head and readying his pen.
"I mean, only about once a month on a regular kind of basis, but other than that it mostly happens when I get too much adrenaline and then it quickly goes down. Messes up my hormones and whatever."
"You did blow everyone away last night, and we never got to tell you how proud we were- are, of you," my dad smiles sadly, as if he had been waiting for the day to say that and now rues it.
"Thank you, I'm pretty sure that's why. This is serously bugging me, do I really need it," I say, motioning at the IV.
The doctor finishes writing and looks up, "Yes, yes of course. You seem alright now and you are just as witty and charming as your family said you were when you are your usual self."
"I'll take your word for it," I say, giving him a slight smile as he cautiously removes to needle.
"Okay, let's get you cleaned up and you can be on your way. Mr. Kenders, I need you to sign a few papers so we can let her go." My father nods, standing up, and following the doctor.
"Um," I say, almost deperate, "can you have Nicole come in, please, dad?"
"Yeah, yeah, sure."
I wait a few seconds before the door opens again and my sister rushes to the seat where my dad left an imprint. She plops onto the chair, and I sit up.
"Hi, how are you?"
"I'm alright, they're gonna let me leave," I say, my hand drifting for the door, "I'm really sorry about all this. I really didn't mean-"
"You had a panic attack, and it's not your fault you couldn't control the most out of control thing. You couldn't help it, and it's alright. You are okay now, and we can all go home." Nicole, nervously smiling, stands. She helps prop me up with pillows behind my back.
The doctor comes back, quickly greeting my sister and removing the clip along with the breathalyzer. He hands me a fresh pair of clothes that my mom brought me and leads Nicole out so I can get dressed.
Suddenly, I feel awful. I can't help but feel like I put everyone through so much trouble, and I hate myself even though I know I couldn't help fainting because my body wouldn't function. I put the clothes on and slowly make my way to the door. Just before my hand reaches the knob, it twists. I step back, letting the door open. Mom. She smiles, the looks at the floor.
"Everyone got to come in and talk to you one on one, I thought I'd do the same."
"Hi," I feel my face flush with frustration. I step away and slump on the bed while my mother makes her way to the chair.
"Hi, I just wanted to talk a bit about whatever went on at your Aunt's house."
"Okay."
"Ehem, so, uh, I wanted to apologize. I feel terrible about how I have honestly never noticed. I don't know how it slipped by me, it's just...we get so caught up with your sister. She had showed something from a very young age and-"
"And I didnt? And no she did not, she was enrolled in that at a young age, and she just stuck with it. There was no raw talent there. She never had time to develop any talent for that, she just learned how to do it. I, however, remember trying to show you what I was doing at school, only you would wave me away. All those years you never showed up for those concerts..ha, I got a solo for every single one, and you two were too absorbed in Nicole, and I was there and no body showed up."
"I know. I get it, we needed this shock to realize that we have as talented a kid as anyone could only dream of and need to show you off. I am so sorry, Vivian. You know I love you."
"Yeah, yeah. And I guess I love you too," I smurk, tilting my head to the floor. My mom stands up, and I do the same. She takes my head and pulls me into a loving hug. When she loosens, she gives me a kiss on my forehead and we walk out of the room.