That Sweet Deal

Chapter 17: Leaving U 2

Gwen raced home after being at the bakery. She quickly changed and showered before walking across the hall to Dorian's place. Holding a small white box with a slice of strawberry cheesecake she brought from the bakery, something she thought they could share after dinner, Gwen raised her hand to knock. Nervously she stared at the door and forced her hand to knock, twice.

Gwen shouldn't be anxious, she knows this. Understanding how he feels and that she is truly falling for him, the thought of him leaving at any moment never to see him again, terrifies her. How can he be so calm about it? Now she is desperate to touch him, just to be with him.

The door swung open and her billowy gray sweatshirt that is two sizes too big blew toward him in the small gust. Even the air around her was pulling her toward him. Obviously not, but she likes to imagine Mother Nature is on her side. Perhaps she should become a Druid and sacrifice a goat to the gods to keep him safe with her.

The more Gwen thought of the blood and the life of the poor goat she realized that would be too mean and icky. She scrunched up her face at the thought.

"Do you not like lasagna?" Dorian's velvety voice snapped her out of her thoughts of a cold dead goat on a rock.

"What?" His hand reached for her and tugged her toward the kitchen.

"You looked like you didn't like the smell and since I am making lasagna for dinner I can only assume that is what you disliked." He waved his hand toward the oven.

"Oh I love lasagna!" Gwen fidgeted with the box in her hand as she came to sit on the stool by the kitchen counter, then pushed it away on to the flat surface. She wanted to go up to him and throw her arms around him but part of her sensed something was wrong. Sure he smiled and made lasagna for her, like the hot studly man he is, but she sensed a hesitancy in him.

Even before the mix up with Cynthia he would always grope her when he got the chance and have his way with Charlotte and Victoria. But he wasn't touching her, just held her hand to the kitchen and then dropped it like a cold fish.

When he explained everything earlier it all made sense and the way he said it, gah. She had his words going on a loop in her head to get her through the rest of her day. Dorian made her feel special, like he would do anything for her, but right now as they stand alone in his kitchen she feels like she is trespassing. Some unwanted guest who over-stayed her welcome.

She shakes her head trying to focus on the facts. He wouldn't have invited her over if he didn't want to be with her. Especially if he is cooking her dinner.

"Um, there is something I need to talk to you about after dinner Gwen." His eyes drop to the floor as does her heart.

He's going to break up with her isn't he? This is why he is acting distant. He's worse than Steve by making her come back to him only to break up with her. Steve was just lazy and self-centered, what Dorian is doing is torture!

"If you are going to break up with me Dorian, just do it now. If I eat the lasagna and you break up with me I am liable to throw it up." Gwen pushed off the stool to stand in front of him. She may be about to have her heart ripped from her but she isn't going to take it seated.

"No! Gwen, why do you keep thinking this is going to end?" Dorian waved his hand between them.

Damn him! Why did his question feel like a punch to her heart? Her eyes began to water as her ears felt as if they were on fire. As she spoke her voice wobbled, her throat threatening to choke her, "Because Dorian it always does! Just when I think I am happy or content it's over or the guy turns into a loser. You said yourself that your life comes at a risk and that you may leave at any time. In the few hours since I have seen you, you may have thought it's best to just end this, to prevent further heartbreak."