Bleeding and Nothingness

Scary Thoughts

I sometimes cringe at the sound of happiness. 

How did it crawl back to me after so long?

I shudder at the feel of someone's arms around me,

Sleepless nights are the outcome of fear

From both him and I.

He's scared of getting close to me,

Worried I'll end up smothering him

With my freezing touch and shaky fingers.

I fret his opinion of me :

Will he take my words as promises

Or twist every one of them

Until they're so dry they can't stand still

And they break at every exhalation ?

We're peculiar that way.

He's scared of not loving me enough,

I'm scared of loving him too much.

We learned to wish on already dead lights,

I got used to believing in already dead love.