Finding the Missing Piece: Book 5

Chapter Seven

"I think she's gonna be the same way." Peeta says and I think that he's right.

I smile and just enjoy her being so little, it's not going to last long.

"Food should be done soon." Peeta says.

"When are you gonna knock this one up again, Peetie?" Finnick wiggles his eyebrows up and down.

I shoot him a death glare.

"Not for a long time, probably won't do it again." Peeta says awkwardly.

He knows I won't want another baby for a long time but I am sure I will want more eventually. I just hope he knows that Willow probably won't be our only kid.

Annie sighs, "Finnick, quit being rude."

"I'm just asking, Ann." He says.

I roll my eyes.

"If and when we decide to have another baby, I'll let you know." Peeta rolls his eyes.

I can tell he's kind of annoyed.

Finally, he gets me.

"Fine." Finnick says and shoots me a knowing look. He's doing it to piss me off-I know.

"What about you?" I ask, even though I hate doing that to Annie.

"I'm not sure." He says.

"Well, we aren't either." I say.

Peeta sighs deeply, I can tell the rest of the night is going to be awkward now.

"I'm gonna go check on dinner." Peeta gets up and goes into the kitchen.

I stare at the floor.

"Is he mad?" Finnick asks.

"I'm sure." I shrug my shoulders.

"I didn't mean to piss you guys off." He shrugs guiltily.

"Don't worry about it." I mumble.

Most of his remarks unintentionally piss me off but I love him, he's like my brother.

"You need to learn to keep your mouth shut." Annie says to him and he shrugs.

"It's fine, Finnick. Peeta is just thinking about it all, I'm sure. I don't know." I sigh.

Finn lets out a high pitched squeal and claps his hands excitedly.

I laugh, "What was that?" I ask him and he grins, showing me his little teeth that have started to come in.

"You can let him play on the floor. I think there are toys in that closet." I say to them.

Finnick sets him on the ground and then gets in the closet and gets a few of Carter's play toys out of the bucket and gives them to Finn. He plays on the floor and crawls around while we make small talk. Peeta comes back in a little later and says dinner is ready so I put Willow in her little swing Peeta bought her and she falls right back to sleep. Finn sits in Annie's lap while we all eat and chat a little, whatever Finnick said earlier must really pissed Peeta off because he's barely talking and I can tell he's bothered by something.

After awhile, they leave and Peeta sits on the couch where he's been since after dinner and stares at Willow.

I go back over and sit down extra close to him.

"What's wrong, Peeta?" I mumble to him, resting my chin on his shoulder but he doesn't move.

"Nothing."

"You're lying."

He shrugs and turns to me, "I want more kids. You barely liked the idea of having Willow and I know you don't want anymore for a long time but ugh-I don't know. It's stupid for me to worry now." He groans frustratedly, closing his eyes.

I put my hand on his back, "Peeta, calm down. I'm not mad by what he said. You shouldn't be either." I tell him truthfully.

"But eventually one of us will bring it up." He says and I know it's true.

"We don't have to yet. Willow is a week old." I say.

"But still, we both know it's going to come up eventually."

"Do you want to discuss some of it now or later?" I ask him.

"I don't know."

"Peeta, I know you think I didn't want Willow but when I found out, I wanted her more than anything in the world. I was scared but I realized that there's a lot to be scared about but it's everything I never knew that I needed. I love you both so much. I love being a mom and being a parent with you. When WE decide to have another baby then we can but I don't want another one until we are both ready, okay?"

He nods his head, knowing not to argue further.

"I love you, you know that and you also know whenever you think it's time for us to have another one, we will talk about it. Eventually, I'll be ready too or vice versa but she's only a week old, we have a long time to think about it all. Right?"

He nods again but won't look me in the eyes.

"Look at me." I say, grabbing his cheeks.

His eyes stubbornly meet mine.

"I love you." I say and pull his lips to mine.

"I love you too." He mumbles.

"Since it's nine o'clock. I would like to go to bed soon but I really need to shower. Will you wake her up in a few minutes, feed her and then wear her out so we can both get a few hours of sleep?" I ask.

A crooked smile crosses his face and he nods and I go upstairs to shower.

I know he's afraid of talking about things like that with me anymore and even though she's only a week old, he's right, eventually, the whole baby thing will be brought up again, we both know it. He's got it burned in the back of his mind that I didn't want her but I did.

Now that I look back on it, I regret every time I told him 'no' and argued with him about it. Being a mother has been one of the two best things I've ever experienced in my life.