Sacrifices

Torn

      As soon as Anakin spat his anger towards me, I knew that I should of done more. There was a part of me that never quite understood how much anticipation he actually had in the possibility of being a Council member--from the years we've known each other, I had missed flaws in him that would only hold him back. You know better. You made yourself blind to them. He has always proved himself, but not without a cause--from being reckless to reconciling with feelings that brought out the dark side of him. Even so, I am on edge--it was Master Windu that had urged the Council for the proposal. Something told me that it wasn't made purely as a decision that would help him. Realization boils inside of me as I direct my glance at the tall, brown man, expression blank and oblivious to what had happened. 

"You wanted this, didn't you?"

      It wasn't rather a question, but the truth--Windu had doubted Anakin as a child, the Chosen One, a child, and an adult. He glowers under a deep frown. 

"Obi Wan, I begin to wonder if he gets such terrible personal attachment issues  because of you."

     My voice rises, the sting of the insult invigorating  the engagement. No wonder Anakin couldn't stand him at times. "Admit it, Master Windu--you have never liked or understood Anakin! You did this more out of spite than anything!" Plo Koon tilts his head at the situation--he seems to be observing the mess going on than actually making a motion to stop it. Shaak Ti holds the side of her lekku, shaking her head softly. 

"I am sorry, Obi Wan. But it is for the best."

      Standing, I struggle to hold back frustration. "Admit it, all of you! You never planned on making him a Council member, let alone give him a chance!" My tone darkens, unveiling the small bits and pieces that they didn't know. "His mother a slave--dead and father no where to be seen! He is one of the strongest people I have come to know." Has everyone forgotten how much he's lost? The only reason he's broken is because he's lived a live of giving, only for everything he holds close to slip between his fingers. Master Windu condescending tone irks me, still stubborn and not moved.

"Why don't you just admit that you've let him get away with things that others would not be able to? You aren't innocent in this, Master Kanobi."

     Opening my mouth, I feel beads of sweat cascading off my brow. Master Yoda, who merely lifts a wrinkled hand, silences everyone. Either it is the light, or maybe just me, but there's hints of tears in his big eyes. 

"Council!"

     Master Windu drifts lazily from a glare, simmering down as he settled in his chair and looked at Yoda blankly. I feel my temper shrink.

"What has happened, can you see? Broken, Anakin is. Broken..." He points to all of us. "Broken we all are! Losing ourselves, we all are. Gotten to all of us, the war has." He gives a lofty sigh, the hushed room thickening the air. Master Yoda leaves the Council without another word, and I bend my head in defeat. 

     It's clear Windu has pressed the decision for Anakin not becoming a Member harder than I thought. But...is he the reason that everyone sees Anakin as not a Jedi to be reckoned with? Or have I just been so blind to a monster that I have created?