the rioutous yet vibrant fireworks going off in my tummy aren't helping me grasp hold of the anxiety that comes with our arranged get-togethers and although they're merely simple teatimes with sugar cubes melting on the surface of my tongue, the electricity that travels through eye contact with you never fails to leave me so torturously charged. ( every ! single ! time ! ) the simple way you curl your fingers around the teacup and the hardly noticeable coffee stains lining your lips always seem to heighten the ephemeral euphoria im in before everything comes crashing down when you flash the most heartwarming of grins at someone who is not me; it's the girl under the pretty pink parasol with cherry lips and long flowing hair. the jolts that charged me slowly lose their exciting sting and a bitter pain slowly falls across my heart like a curtain; like the mask i use to hide the lonely hurt im forced to deal with whenever she swings around. i know i've never been your aurora, nor will i ever be your belle ( trust me, you're worlds apart from the beast ), but maybe i took your kind recognition for granted. maybe i shouldn't have pulled myself onto a throne that has already been reserved for your Wendy who's back from her mortal world. i should have known better than to wander around your kingdom, to let myself believe that skinny jeans, old records and toy figurines would be accepted as the new rule. i should have known that an old soul would always be bound for the dump, and that mild manners and esteemed excellence would always shine through. im nobody in your Neverland, I'll never fit in into your world of wonders. I know my place now.
a/n:
one of my older ones hahah i haven't really gotten the time to think much yet but anyway i hope you like this one! x
