[18] Good Girls, So Overrated

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(Clarification: if you feel like the story is jumping too fast, it's because the canon story fills in the rest. I'll still try my best to pinpoint where we are in the books but let me know if you don't get it.♡)

(TW: alcohol consumption, slightly sexual harassment, slight violence, explicit sexual content, slight choking, slight degradation during argument?)

LILY

I sighed, slouching on Mara’s couch as she brought some pizza slices. Finally!
I dug in immediately, enjoying the taste of the mix of ingredients. A grumble of satisfaction left my lips as I chewed. 

“So, tell me!” Mara pressed me, and I told her what happened at the party, talking shit about some people and other gossip.

“The Horsemen are insufferable, I swear to God.” Mara sighed, leaning back in the armchair as she sipped on her drink. 

“Yeah, but how can I blame them? I wasn’t very nice, I can’t be mad at them for caring more about Winter than me.”
I said, sipping on my glass. 

“Michael had the gut to say Winter is better than you? Really? He must be biased because his girl is blonde.” “Yeah, but, she is. Like, she’s so pretty and rich and popular. She’s like an angel and she’s nice.”
I said, talking about Winter. I didn’t wanna be sorry for myself, but the way Damon looked at her as she was at the center of the ballroom. Her perfect hair, and perfect body, and expensive gowns. I bet she used Damon’s money to buy them, or he bought them for her. 

“I was so out of place, I felt like a commoner sneaking into the party, I didn’t belong there. She’s the princess and I’m the peasant that gave him a good time.” 

I said again, not understanding why it mattered. I never cared about mingling with the rich cliques of Thunder Bay but maybe it was because I wanted to be at Damon’s level…but I wasn’t enough, and I would have never been. He and I belonged to different worlds. And the realization made me want to cry.
Was it the alcohol? Probably. 

“Stop feeling sorry for yourself, you idiot. Come with me!” Mara sighed, and grabbed my arm pulling me up. We walked to her bedroom, where a full body mirror was placed against the wall.

“Look at yourself, you’re gorgeous. You’re smart, funny, quirky and the baddest bitch I know. Why are you feeling insecure about a pretty doll? Mh? Let Damon choose her, he’s gonna get bored and will regret not choosing you.”
Mara said, nodding confidently, and I looked at myself. My brown eyes stared at my reflection, taking in my black hair, slightly wavy, wild and rebellious. My black eye pencil made my eyes look intimidating, and the way my black dress hugged my body made me feel sexy. I looked like a witch…

“The baddest bitch you know, huh?” I said, cocking my eyebrow up. Mara nodded and grinned back at me. 

“Say it, say “I’m a bad bitch.” She demanded, and I compiled. My voice still unsure as I repeated the words. “Again!” Mara ordered me and I said it again, slightly more confidently. Mara pressed me again and I breathed in and out before looking at myself again. “I’m a bad fucking bitch!” I said, pointing at my chest. “Hell yeah!! Let’s fucking drink!” Mara yelled, hyping me up. 

We ended up drinking more, some friends of Mara came to join us, and we were in a group of 10, 6 girls and 4 boys. We chatted and listened to music, but the alcohol was starting to get to my head, I needed it so badly though so I didn’t care.

“This is your song, baby” Mara said, as "Cut My Hair" by Tate McRae started to play. I grabbed an empty bottle of beer and used it as a microphone.

The lyrics flew through me, as the girls hyped me up and I could feel the guys eyes on me as I sang angrily. Was J thinking about Damon? Me? Winter? Yes, I was.

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