As Easy As Murder

20. creatures of many kind

"Have you heard from Janey?" Loretta looks up at me, sipping on a smoothie.

We're out for brunch at a local dessert-only cafe. 

I yawn. I didn't reach out to Liam last night, but Lord did he. 

As much as I hate to admit it, I stayed up all night on a facetime call with him. It's unlike me; letting someone consume my time like that, but I did. And I regret it. 

I register what Loretta said, and come to think of it, I haven't heard from Janey since that one phone call almost a week ago. I get slapped in the face by a sudden pang of worry given the circumstances. I shake my head. 

"No," I mumble. "I haven't, not since saturday." 

Her eyes flicker to wideness a bit, and then return to normal. We sit in silence for a moment, sipping our berry smoothies and taking spoonfuls of ice cream. She sighs, gnawing her cheek, hair frizzed out. "Think we should check up on her?" 

I think, sighing and looking down at my feet, black stompers stained with mud from Loretta getting her LEASED car stuck in the mud and us having to manually push it through. I'm sure that cost will be fun. 

I open Janey and I's message thread, and the last date of talking being almost 2 weeks ago lowers a pit in my stomach. I nod, "Yeah, maybe we ought to. Just like a casual wellness check." 

We finish our delicious smoothies, and we stand up. I didn't tell her I stayed up all night. Even though we share a closet-sized room, by the grace of God and Loretta being a heavy sleeper, I was able to hide the conversation and avoid being bombarded by questions and squeals. 

We get into Loretta's poor lease and start towards the dormitory.

The last thing I heard about Janey was an email from her mother, saying Janey was doing better and was moving into an apartment that her father owns. 

 Thinking back, no one has even mentioned Janey in the past week, and my stomach sinks with guilt. I thought I was giving her space, but now I feel like I was ignoring her. 

We pull up outside of this supposed apartment, which looks more like a storage area. The shingles are rusting, and trashcans are knocked over and spilling out. I guess this was her fathers work apartment, but still 

Loretta knocks on the door, "Janey?" 

Nada. 

"Dude, what if she got back with him? I swear, I will chop off each of his toes individually and hang them from a clothes line.." She paced, slamming her fist into her opposing hand. 

I text the others in the group chat, informing them that we're checking up on Janey. Jesse and Bishop send worried words of support. Loretta knocks again, and still to no avail. Multiple knocks later, we realize the door is open.

I gently push open the door with a creak, and gasp at the sight. 

Thing are strewn everywhere. Paper, books, magazines. Photos of her and Collin are torn up all over the floor. Tissues are gathered into piles. Loretta's eyes are wide, and I'm sure mine are equally as such. 

We just stand there, looking over the tornado of a room we're standing in. 

A small sound comes from a back bedroom, sniffling. 

Loretta's brow furrows and she goes storming into the bedroom, where Janey is sitting in a shrine of tissues and empty snacks. Her hair is frizzed into an absolute mess, her cheeks are tear-stained. 

She has on pajama pants and a sweatshirt, which is presumably Collin's judging by the way she has her nose pressed up to the sleeve, sniffing it like her life depends on it, and sobbing everytime she smells his cologne. 

Loretta looks like she's going to get so angry that she blasts off through the ceiling. 

The room is littered with empty soda cans, and a sappy romance plays on the TV. Posters are on the walls, the biggest being of Taylor Swift, and next to it Olivia Rodrigo. 

Loretta growls, "OVER A GUY, JANEY? A MAN? A DAMN MALE?" 

Janey sobs louder, her lip quivering, which only seems to hype up Loretta more to continue her..interesting pep-talk technique. She jumps onto the bed, landing in that spider-man position. 

She picks up a photo of Collin and starts listing flaws, cranking out imperfections like a machine, the tension in the room growing big enough to pop. Clothes are in piles all over the room, and in the middle, a scrapbook with pictures of the two of them. 

"LOOK AT HIM!" She points to the photo with her index finger, radiating with rage and expaseration, completely and utterly vexated, "SITTING THERE LIKE A CREATURE. HE HAS THE FACIAL HARMONY OF A POSSUM, JANEY. HE IS BUT A LEAF THAT CLOGS YOUR GUTTER, UNDERSTAND?" 

This cracks a smile on Janey's exhausted face, her eyebags crinkling with a grin, but not interrupting the sobbing, so she's now doing this bizzare laugh-cry that is morphing into a choke. 

And while I'm glad Loretta was able to crack the shell of depression around Janey's weak limbs, I'm triggered. While Loretta is only playfully yelling, it still sends a shudder of fear down my spine. 

"Loretta?" I choke out, but she's too busy describing how Collins feet depict that of a reptile, and that his arms are as gangly as those of a praying mantice, all while possessing crazy eyes. Janey's laugh-cry has turned into a full-on laugh as she giggles. 

I look down at my feet, trying to take deep breaths, and eventually snap myself out of it. I'm hit with a wave of embarrassment, ashamed that my less than peaceful past still comes out to play at something as simple as playful agression. 

I sigh. 

Eventually, Loretta calms down, running out of things to point out about the guy, "And, to conclude, he also looks washed out in plaid and yellow. 

I clap, and Loretta does a stage bow, then opens the window and throws the photo of Collin out, allowing it to flutter in the breeze, a symbol of letting go, and facing forward, viewing what's next instead of being fixated on what was. 

I try to Invision a photo of my ex doing the same. It should be so easy. 

Yet, I can't. 

My brain imagines a photo of Kori fluttering away, and imaginary me runs after it. I cringe. Ew. 

Me and Loretta look around the place while Janey takes a shower, which she was inspired to do by Loretta, who did a theatrical performance while holding a loofa to motivate her. 

 We can hear her singing 'Stuck In The Middle With You'. We both are not super impressed with the condition of the place, and most of it is by no fault of Janey's. The wallpaper is peeling off, and there's mold in the corner of the ceilings, not to mention the army of spider-webs guarding every doorway like gargoyles. 

"I don't think we should allow her to stay here," Loretta whispers, gesturing to a cockroach climbing the wall. 

"Ew! EW EWEW! NONONONONO EEEE!" I shriek and pick up a broom, arming myself to fight off the thumb-sized demon. 

"Relaxxx," Loretta says with the chillness of Bob Marley, "He's cool. Let's name him Tom." To my absolute digust and horror, she puts her arm out, allowing 'Tom' to climb onto it. I start to gag and flap my arms in pure dismay.

Janey walks out and looks unphased by the satanic insect, and just shrugs. I look at her like she grew an extra arm. 

Ultimately, we decide to bring Janey back to the dormitory with us, and have her leave Collin behind at this storage area-resembling apartment that looks like the set of a horror movie and is the host of Tom and many others. 

We're back in Loretta's lease, all 3 of us screaming along to the radio, Janey bopping her head so hard she was on the verge of whiplash. Even though me and Loretta downed 2 scoops each of Strawberry Cheescake Blast Ice cream at the cafe, we stop at Byrne Dairy and Loretta and Janey devour some soft serve. 

I opt out, courtousy of my lactose intolerance. I'll already be facing toilet time, no need to lengthen my sentence. 

We arrive back at the dorm, and collapse onto the couch. 

Just when I thought we were done consuming things for the night, Loretta whips out a bottle of Rose' and proposes drinking away our problems. I groan, but Janey, still a little loopy from the anesthesia of heartbreak, jumps at the chance. 

So the two of them went a little crazy. Glasses were board, kareoke was (very poorly) sung, and fun was had. I too joined in on the encrazed fun, and it turned into a full on celebration. We even face timed Jesse from his new lover's parent's place, and they sung a duet, which unfortunatly brought Janey to tears again, but we handled it. 

By the end of the night, the three of us were exhausted, but exhausted with big smiles on our faces. 

I decided to let Janey share my bed, saving her from demonic torture of Loretta's snoring, which sounds like satan sneezing. 

I scroll through a new batch of Gerold photos. 10 today alone, and I'm not complaining. I smile at the light grey of his flattend fur, his well-loved appearance warming my heart. 

With Janey passed out at my feet, and Loretta fighting sleep while watching the very mature adult film of Stuart Little, I quickly answer when my phone rangs as not to disturb them. 

I answer, smiling to hear that it's Mom. 

"Hey sweetie, sorry to call so late. Just wanted to make sure I have the right day for the day you're coming home for break? The 20th right? I'm sorry for disturbing, but you know how brain-fogged I've been lately." 

I shake my head, "It's no problem, Mom. It's actually the 22nd." 

She sighs, and makes a noise of annoyance, "Your mother is getting old, Averen. You know your Dad had to remind me to turn my sewing machine on today? I was just sliding the fabric through mindlessly. Someone shoot me." 

I laugh, and feel bad for doing so after. My poor mother, trying to make ends meet against Dad's failing bike shop, while also battling diabetes and tons of medications side-effects. I sigh, "Don't be so hard on yourself, Mom. I promise I'll help out as much as possible when I come home. Dad's been telling me how much you've been overworking yourself. You're only one lady, ma. Slow down." 

She sighs, "Thanks, sweetie, but your father is just a worry wart." She chuckles softly. Her tone doesn't convince me, and it's not just her tone. She's wrong. My Dad never worries about anything, so when he worries, there's a reason to worry. 

After a bit more banter and updates about how the lady's in her yoga class are doing, I'm left in silence. Well apart from the Stuart little playing from Loretta's side of the room, even though she's half-asleep, chin pressed to her chest, double chin evident. I chuckle and snap a picture to blackmail and torture her with the next time she tries to mess with me. 

I'd hate for any of her sneaky links to get a photo of her with a triple chin and a string of drool. 

Janey snuggles up to me in her sleep, "Collin.."

Oh, poor girl. 

My phone rings again. 

It's a sign. 

Blegh, ew, horrible memory. 

  I don't look at the contact name, figuring it's just Mom telling me something she forgot to the first time, perhaps that Bertha from yoga is getting that divorce after all. Or that Shannon did infact buy that empty building on main street to open that flower shop. 

But to my shock, It's Liam. 

Oh no. 

I might as well ask him to lingerie shopping with me, huh?

Someone kill me. 

I get up at the speed of a sloth, making the faintest of movements, not wanting to disturb the sleeptalking Janey. I'm able to stand up without waking her, success. 

I creep to the bathroom and fix my hair, then answer the call. He's laying in bed, his hair messy and damp, a drowsy smile on his face. Unfortunately, after my heart does a flip, his grin only places the image of Kori's in my head. God damn it, I almost went a whole day without thinking of the twerp. 

Tommorow I will.

Maybe. 

Right?

I prop up my phone on a soap bottle and try to give a natural smile, but probably look like a preschooler getting a school picture taken. 

"Hey?!" It comes out weird and squeaky and like an excited question. I roll my eyes at myself, and he just chuckles. I start to brush my teeth, the only thing I could think of to act natural. 

"Hey there. So, I have a question." 

I nod, leaning against the counter. 

"You, me, a date. Friday. Yeah?" 

My eyes widen and my hand drops, toothbrush falling out of my mouth. My other hand brushes against the faucet, turning on the water full force. Then, in my pathetic and dazed state, instead of turning the knob, y'now, like you do, I cover the faucet, causing water to spray everywhere, including all over me. 

Liam looks like he doesn't know what to think, and I start running over different plastic surgery I could get to change my entire appearence and identity. I wonder what name I would use. Probably Nancy, Nancy's nice. 

"A dateee?" It comes out prolonged. 

"Uh, yes, a dateee." He chuckles. 

"Uhh..I don't know," I come to my senses, tapping my fingers on the counter in thought. 

"Oh, come on, it'll be fun. Besides, you and me have so much in common." 

I nod slowly. He's right, and for some reason I don't want him to be. I get hit with a monster of bad vibes. I furrow my eyebrows, questioning why this bad energy is only presenting itself now. 

"I mean, I gue-" 

"Could you wear red?"

I blink. "Pardon?" 

"Red. Wear red. You looked so good in red on Halloween. Wear red." 

"Uh, oka-" 

"Great. I love a woman who will do what I say." 

Before I can even take in the extent of that lovely little comment, he concludes the conversation, as if he didn't just drop this absolute information bomb right on my head, "Have a goodnight, bye, cya friday, I'll pick you up, toodles." He throws up a peice sign. 

"Wait-"

He hangs up. 

I stand there, looking of into the imaginary camera, blinking. I throw my arms up in mock defeat, completely dumbfounded, flabbergasted. What did I just get myself into? Who did I just get myself into? 

I'm supposed to just show up to this date and pretend I don't think this guy is going to murder me? 

The fact that I asked him he shops at a cutesy little lingerie shop is the least of my problems with this guy now. 

Do I tell Kori? 

Something in me shouts no. 

I open the bedroom door, deciding to sleep on it. And also sleep on it tommorow. And the day after that. 

Basically, pretend it didn't happen. 

I open the bathroom door, and jump when I'm met by Loretta, who is standing there with this smug smile. 

"And you're always on me about my bad dates and taste, ohhh, how the tables have turned." 

"Etti, you have got to help me get out of this, come up with an excuse for me, tell him i'm sick, anything, PLEA-" 

"Nope, that's what you get, you're on your own." 

I smirk, showing her the photo I snapped of her in her less then picture perfect state earlier. 

"HOLY SH- Alright, let's come up with some options." She chuckles nervously, faking a big smile.

I smile and nod, and we sit down at the table.

As she runs through excuses she's used in the past, I suddenly imagine Kori's voice. 

I remember his adorable French accent, how soothing his voice can be when he's calm. 

Oh, what this man has done to me. 

I imagine his picture fluttering out of the window again. 

And I imagine myself standing there to catch it. 

In that moment, I knew...

I was in deep shit.