A Book Of My OC's

- Old Brown Coat -

Ahhh lore and angst wtf
TW: Mentions of 🍇
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Ivan's POV

I was about six years old when I was taken from my home in Wales and taken to America by my uncle. He took me to a town in Indiana. It was bad ever since I got there but somehow it's gotten worse. I didn't think it was possible but here we are.

My uncle wasn't a good man. He never was and never will be a good person. He can't change. He won't change.

I've learned to stop caring. I've learned to stop expecting people to be good. I've learned to ignore his touch and his anger. Maybe he'll take me back to momma and papa when I make him happy.

When he's in a bad mood and comes to my bedroom, I've learned to just...dissociate myself. It still hurts though...

He tells me that no one would ever take care of me like he does. He says he cares.

I've rubbed my skin nearly raw when I tried to wash away the shame. I've gotten rid of many outfits because I can't stand the sight of them. I couldn't wear them. So I let them rot on the ground.

But he gives me stuff when he's sorry. He gives me stuffed animals. He gives me candy and makes me my favorite food. He watches movies with me. He tells me that he loves me. He says he's sorry and he'll be gentle next time.

He's never gentle. He tells me I'm full of hate and resentment. He says that he's doing this because he wants the best for me.

I stopped caring because I knew that I would be lost without him.

When he isn't mad, he lets me see my friends. He lets me do that only when he's happy with me.

Sometimes my friends argue. Not only sometimes, it's practically a hobby of theirs but it doesn't bother me.

My friends can be rude, but I'm rude too so it's okay...I guess?

Though sometimes I wish I could get close to them without getting cold feet and pushing them away. I don't like to be rude and angry.
I don't like to be resentful.

I just want someone who can-

Maybe I've spoken too much. Maybe the world is over me talking to myself too much. I should stop this inner monologue. It's pointless.

There's a sudden knock at the door and I get up quickly. I run to the door and open it.

There stands my uncle. He's back with a bag of my favorite candy and a new stuffed animal for me. He's wearing an old brown coat and it smells like smoke.

I wrap my arms around him.

Suddenly I'm six years old all over again.