A Cheers to the Life You Don't Get to Choose //Noah Sebastian

VIII

trigger warning: light mentions of eating disorders

A month has gone by and it has been a really lonely month. Ice Nine Kills just got back home three days ago, Beartooth is on the road, along with Will who returns in two weeks. Bad Omens comes home tomorrow.

I'm struggling, mentally.

I miss my family, and I miss Will a lot. Our relationship has been blossoming at our own pace. He's so respectful and kind, never pushing anything that I am not comfortable with. Noah only speaks to me when he needs to lately and has been short.

The coffee shop has been extremely busy and I have taken on more responsibility because Carol has been having health issues. At least I'm keeping busy at the shop and with my feisty two year old.

Tonight, I am having Spencer and Nadia over for dinner. I craved company. Sloane is taking her afternoon nap and they are expected any minute I am using this time to pour myself a glass of red wine and get the house cleaned up.

I have to admit, I've been struggling with eating. I'm eating maybe once a day. I've been struggling with my anxiety and trying so fucking hard. I've relapsed again, but I'm pulling myself back together for Sloane.

"Hello!" I hear the door open, followed by Nadia's voice.

"Hi guys!" I hug them both.

"We brought a special guest, if that's okay with you." Spencer says with a smirk.

"The more the merri- Noah?"

He walks in behind Nadia with a soft smile. He looks good with his black peacoat, turtleneck and skinny jeans. Suiting for the chilly October weather we've been having.

"Hey." He smiles and hands me a bottle of wine.

"Hi." I hesitantly take the bottle from his hands.

"Thought I would surprise you and Sloane a day early." He shrugs.

"She's in her room. Her nap time is about over anyways." He nods and retreats upstairs to grab our little gremlin.

"You could have warned me." I shot a look between Nadia and Spencer. Things with Noah and I have been extremely awkward ever since my little run in with Will and Noah in my hotel room. I still don't know what Noah said to him, if anything at all, but Will won't tell me.

Noah returns with Sloane and she is extremely happy, especially that Noah is here. "Make yourselves comfortable, I'm going to finish up dinner." I shooed everyone off to the living room.

Not too much longer I feel a presence behind me. "You were going to make my favorite without me?" He chuckles.

"Yes." I deadpan. Carbonara is a staple in this household thanks to my mother teaching me when I was younger. It just so happens to be Noah's favorite and he has not had it since we split up.

"Can I help?" He asks.

"No." It was short and came out ruder than expected but I honestly was not ready for small talk with him yet. Of course he has to push it though and not leave, so I give in. I have him set the table and we worked in silence.

My phone rings and my eyes light up to see it is Will. I excuse myself from the kitchen and swear I saw Noah's knuckles go white hanging on to a plate. What is going on with him?

"Hey beautiful." Will greets me, followed up with a blush from myself.

"Hi. How's the tour?" I ask. He looks so handsome with his curls in this face.

"It's good. We go on in about an hour. I just wanted to call and say hi to my favorite girl."

"I miss you." I whine.