rag doll | TWD

[68] time for after

Daryl looked between the two, leaving his eyes on JJ, "Maybe you should go with Rosita."

JJ looked in disbelief, dropping her arms, "Seriously? Why are we just sitting here with our asses hanging out arguing about me leaving? I'm fine- I'm staying."

"Alright," Daryl nodded, "Come on. Let's go."

♮♮♮

Michonne, Tara, JJ and Daryl sat waiting in the truck, closely watching the Sanctuary. JJ sat on the passenger side by Tara, annoyed with Daryl and Michonne. 

"You take fire from the windows, we fire back." Morgan told them through the walkie. 

Tara motioned for JJ to open to the truck door, "Come on. There's a spot for cover by the chutes." 

As the two crawled out, Michonne hung back with Daryl. 

"You up for this?" He asked her. 

She heavily sighed, "I came here 'cause I wanted to see things for myself. I wanted to know that things were gonna work. But you know what? I don't get to know that. None of us do."

"What I do know is that things are working now. So maybe... we just need to trust that things are gonna keep working, because this... what we're about to do- it's not worth risking us."

Daryl looked down, softly telling her, "It is for me. Just is."

"I hope it works." Michonne sadly shook her head. "I- I really, really do, but I can't do it. I just can't."

"Then you shouldn't." Daryl nodded. 

Michonne hesitated before finally exiting the truck, slamming the door behind her. 

"Just promise me you won't do anything stupid."

JJ shrugged in response. Michonne dropped her head to the side, signaling her frustration with the blonde. She sighed one last time before turning the other way to head home, hoping she would be able to catch up with Rosita.

"We got Morgan and the snipers." Tara told Daryl through the driver's side window. "We can do this."

"Yeah. We will." 

Just as Daryl started the truck back up and lightly began to place his foot on the gas, JJ opened the passenger door and climbed back in.

"The hell you doin'?" 

"What's it look like? 

"A stupid decision."

JJ shrugged, "I'll cover you."

"From the truck?" He sassed. 

She rolled her eyes, "are we gonna do this shit or not?"

Daryl huffed, "You sure you're up for this?"

She nodded.

Hesitantly, Daryl began driving straight for the building. He readied the cement brick to exchange for his foot on the gas. 

"You ready?" 

JJ stared ahead. 

"JJ! You ready?" 

Daryl noticed her unphased emotion as the truck headed toward the Sanctuary. Noticing the time was running out, as soon as he swapped the brick in place of his foot, he grabbed JJ's arm and forcefully pulled her with him from the truck. Then again when they landed on the ground. 

"Daryl, you're clear to the south. Youm JJ and Tara should head home." Morgan gave the all clear. 

"You gonna run on your own, or do I gotta do that for ya too?" Daryl angrily asked JJ. 

She shook her head, following closely behind the two. 

♮♮♮
[JJ]

Daryl followed me into the house, slamming the door behind me. 

I saw this one coming. 

"You wanna tell me what that was?"

I turned on my heel, "I'm sorry."

"Sure as hell don't sound like it."

I huffed in annoyance, "I don't know what you wanna hear, Daryl."

"You don't- what the hell, JJ?" He harshly put his hand down on the kitchen island. "You said you were up for that."

"I was." I argued.

"So, what? D'you just hope I wouldn't notice you not movin'?"

"Maybe!"

He seemed taken back by my outburst. 

"I mean, no." I calmed down. "I don't know."

I sighed, running a hand through my hair trying to collect my thoughts, "I was stupid, I know. I shouldn't have put your life on the line like that."

"That's not what I'm worried about."

I kept silent. 

"Do I have a reason to be worried?"

My continuous lack of response didn't exactly give him a hopeful feeling. 

He huffed, which prompted my response. 

"Look, I'm not gonna lie and say that I'm good. I wasn't thinking right. I haven't been since-..." 

"Yeah, I know."

"But you have every right to be pissed. I shouldn't have put you at risk." I apologized, genuinely this time, "I'm sorry."

He remained silent for a moment.

"I promise- no more stupid shit."

Daryl finally looked me in the eye, bringing himself to ask what had been on his mind, "Did you wanna die today?"

I calmed down before answering, taking a deep breath. "I- I thought I did, you know." I truthfully began, "Back at the Sanctuary before I thought I was gonna make it outta there, I tried. But..."

For the first time, I actually took a minute to think about it. Back at the Sanctuary, I was desperate. I wanted a way out. But being back here, with my family, it confused me. 

"Is it because of-" He started, unsure of what he should call the unfortunate situation I was in. 

"Not only, but... yeah, it pushed me over the edge." I admitted, "Especially when I thought I wasn't getting out."

Daryl took a minute before gently asking, "Do you still want out?" 

"No," I answered with hesitation. After I responded is when I thought about it. If I had truly wanted out today, I wouldn't've left Daryl drag me out of the truck. I could've easily held my ground or pushed him out or some shit. 

Maybe I tested myself without even realizing. 

Tested myself in the same fucked up way Andrea tested Beth's will to live back at the farmhouse. 

"I don't want out. Not anymore."

"Good. So, no more stupid shit."

I slightly grinned, pulling him into a tight hug, "No more stupid shit."

Things went quiet and I pulled away from the hug, but still had my arms somewhat around him, "Are we good?"

"Yeah," He nodded, "we're good... But you're not goin' tonight."

I jokingly scoffed, "Are you grounding me?" 

He shot me a look. Point made. 

"Yeah, okay, that's fair."

a/n: happy sunday! hoping to get back on track with weekly updates:)