A Black Comedy

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Harry's bad mood was plain to see as he childishly stomped into the kitchen.

Sirius looked up from the Daily Prophet and smiled at Harry. "No luck?"

Harry grunted negatively.

"Maybe I can help," Sirius offered.

"I don't need to be laughed at," Harry grumbled. "And it's not like you could keep an eye out for me."

"True," Sirius agreed. "But between the two of us, I'm the only one who's successfully mastered the animagus transformation."

Harry frowned, unable to disagree with that. "Alright then, have you got any ideas on how to make this work? Because nothing I've tried has worked."

Sirius folded up the paper, relishing the opportunity to be a proper godfather. "So what have you been trying?"

"Now that I know my form, I've been trying to self-transfigure my fingers and hands first."

Sirius frowned. "And how's that working out for you?"

Harry shrugged. "One time my fingers got really blurry, but I was already dizzy and hit my head earlier, so that might have been nothing."

"Yeah," Sirius slowly drew out the word. "I think you're going about this all wrong."

"I assume you have a suggestion," Harry added. "Or else that was awful advice."

"I do," Sirius said. "You're still thinking of the exercises and steps necessary for normal animagi. Most people have to think about things like structural and physical differences that need to be treated with caution. That's why you're supposed to magically determine how to bridge the gaps between your two different outer shells."

"Outer shells?" Harry said doubtfully.

"Yes, outer shells," Sirius repeated. "You are Harry and only Harry. Harry was born a wizard, and has had the outer shell of a wizard for all of his life. He now also has the option of another outer shell."

"Did you actually study this stuff or just take some really good drugs you found in a desert?"

"Do we need to do a show of hands again to remind people which of us can do this?" Sirius retorted with a condescending look. "As I was saying, outer shells. This is important. You have to stop thinking of yourself as a wizard first. You are Harry first, and a wizard second. Just like I am Sirius first, and a wizard second. And occasionally, I'm Sirius first, and a bad dog second. Always thinking of your own identity first is how you exert control over your different shell's instincts." Sirius rubbed his chin in thought. "Not really sure what a ghost's instincts would be. Maybe being generally depressing and having a slightly superior attitude?"

"That's not how ghosts are," Harry argued, feeling oddly defensive.

"Anyways," Sirius continued. "For most people, it's the small amount of success they get from seeing their hand turn into a paw or whatever that opens their mind to the possibility. To really grasp the idea that you are as much a dog or a ghost as you are a wizard. And there's like a mental switch that is flipped. You know not only is it possible, but it's real and it's you. Once you hit that it just takes months and months of practice to fully transform your whole body."