I met a boy at 17

Kellin - 4

I probably shouldn't of asked him why he self harms but it was so bad I needed to know. Vic seems like such an honest and kind guy I don't know how he's doing that to his perfect body.

Vic sighed shakily sounding like he was about to cry.

I grabbed his hand and spoke

"I promise I won't judge you, your safe to peace if you want"

I sound like a fucking simp. He's so cute though how can I not.

"My um my dad he"  I interrupted.

"It's okay Vic go slow" He gave me and huge smile and continued talking.

"After I came out as gay to my dad he hated me like he hates me, everytime he sees me he hits me. It ruined my mom and his marriage because my mom accepted me but my dad didn't think I was a real "Fuentes" if I was gay. My mom dispises me for coming out as gay and my brother thinks everything is my fault for my parents divorce. And I don't know hurting myself I guess made me feel relif like I deserved it"

Vic let got a long deep sigh after that.

I was completely and utterly shocked. He just told me he was gay? And all that this poor kid I wanted to cry for him.

I reached over and gave him a long hug he definitely needed one. I pulled away and spoke.

"Vic none of that is your fault I hope you know, your dad just seems to be a piece of homophobic trash. Wrists are for braclets not cutting."

I didn't notice but I had my hand on his knee the whole time he was talking. I quickly swiped it off his leg hoping I didn't make him uncomfortable.

"Thanks kell that means a lot. I didn't mean to dump this all on you thank you for listening though" He spoke through sobs.

My heart genuinely hurt for him he didn't deserve that no one deserves that. I also don't know why I care so much about him.

"I asked you Vic and you responded i'm okay with listening."

"Why do you um do it? Like self harm?" Vic said hesitantly almost scared sounding.

No ones ever seen this so I never had to talk about it. I guess right now a better place then ever.

I let a huge sigh and began to talk.

"My dad left when I was 4 days before my 4th birthday. My mom I guess was a mess after that she never cleaned never cooked just drank her feeling away"

I took a big gulp trying to cry.

"When she gets drunk she uh hits me I guess, I know I sound weak but it's my mom I can't hurt her so I just take the beatings. Not having a dad in my life kinda fucked me up. Made me hate myself I suppose. I started cutting myself in 7th grade and just haven't stopped since.

I rejected telling him as soon as I did but I had no reason too it felt good to get off my chest.

"You poor angel you don't deserve that, you deserve to do something you love not the blade. Your so strong for going through all the kell"

'You poor angel' Made my heart flutter.

I guess he does understand what i'm going through even though he's going through way more then me.

"Your a sweetheart Vic thanks for listening. You better not tell a fucking soul what I said though." I said laughed but being genuine with it.

He again puts up his hands defensively and says "I promise no one gonna know"

It felt good being able to telling someone that knowing they wouldn't tell someone. I don't know why I trust Vic so much, he's just some guy I ment in an alley.

Vic puts his hands down and sticks out his pinky and spoke.

"I promise you I won't tell anyone what your going through as long as, you don't tell anyone what i'm going through"

I lift my hand out my lap and pinky promised him and said "I promise"

We both laughed for a few seconds about how childish that all was.

We sat with eachother talking about our lives for a long time listening to the same Linkin Park album on repeat. I really really liked having someone to talk to around my friends I can't be vulnerable or they'll take advantage of me I trust Vic.

"Holy fuck it's 2:30" I said getting up relising we sat here talking to eachother for almost 6 hours.

I didn't wanna leave him I had way too much fun with him today. Atleast I have his snap and I can talk to him after I get home.

We both sprung up and exiting the pool and putting our boards where they were last. Vic leads me out of the abandoned hotel but before we exit to go outside I gave him a long warm hug. I think we both needed a genuine hug.

We exit the front door say bye to each other and walk in different directions. I kept looking back admiring him. He was so attractive, i've never had feeling like this before.

Am I gay?

——

I KNOW THIS IS SHORT AND ABSOLUTE ASS. I'm not expecting anyone to read it though LMAO.

If anyone is reading this how is your day?

ps. sorry for the grammer mistakes LOL.