In your arms

August 10, 2023 - Night of St. Lorenzo

August 10, 2023 - Night of St. Lorenzo

Maya: are you working today?

Carina: I finish in half an hour. Why?

Maya: and what are you doing tonight?

Carina: is this an interrogation?

Maya: it's an invitation. Are you coming to see the stars with me?

Carina: an invitation or a date?

Maya: Carina...

Carina: ....si!

I have never put so much effort into dressing, preparing for the evening, topics of conversation, and even my thoughts, as I did tonight. This is not the first time I have gone out with Carina, in fact.

Both before and after our time apart there have been breakfasts, lunches and dinners spent alone, even at restaurants, there have been visits to exhibitions, movie nights and a few days ago I even accompanied her to see a play at the theater. I don't know what it is that really makes a difference tonight. Maybe it's the fact that tonight I decided to invite her out to do something romantic by definition: look at the stars. Maybe it's the fact that tonight there are no other excuses or justifications: often dinner out has been the only compromise we've found in our schedules, for example. The other night Carina was supposed to go see this musical with Vic, but instead Vic was in bed with a stomach virus and didn't want to risk worsening her condition by going out, considering she left for vacation today.

The fact is that while I was waiting for Carina under her house, my hands were sweating and shaking at the same time. My hands, especially, stayed sweaty all the way through dinner, all the way to this clearing outside Los Angeles, where I know perfectly well that we will see the starry sky and where we can be in peace, lying on the towel I brought with me and the churros we bought on the way. Between Carina and me there has never been a moment of silence, so much so that sometimes I wonder how it is possible that we have so many words to exchange, so many thoughts to communicate. I have never experienced with anyone else this kind of relationship, this desire to want to share every aspect of life and mind, so we are able to go from light-hearted to serious, from sweetness to sensuality.

After parking, I rush to open Carina's door and subsequently open the trunk, taking my backpack, in which I put blankets to sit on the ground, the water bottle I always carry and a spare sweatshirt. I turn smiling toward Carina and notice that she is clutching her arms, perhaps because of a chill running down her back.

M < are you cold?> I ask a little surprised and a wry smile escapes me as well.

C < what do you say?!> Carina exclaims, a little resentful. I smile, biting my lip and hand her my sweatshirt.
M < do you want to?> I ask and she immediately takes advantage, slipping my sweatshirt over her dress. By instinct I grab her hand and Carina does not retreat, so hand in hand we move more centrally across the vast lawn at our disposal and when I catch sight of a corner that seems appreciable I spread the blanket on the ground.

C < do you have another one? > Carina asks me and I look at her with a raised eyebrow.

M < for? >

C < to cover me? > she asks wryly.

M < are you still cold? >

C < it's not my fault that I had to put on the cute little dress and sandals..the sandals, Maya!!, to go out to dinner with you and then you take me to an open clearing at night!>

M < yes, but it's summer..and you're always hot..> I reflect a little aloud.

C < do you have it or not?> she asks rolling her eyes and I smile, tossing her the blanket. A little later we are both lying on the floor: we have placed ourselves with our bodies parallel, but opposite, so that our heads are sticking together. If I turn to look at Carina the perspective is a little squashed and weird, but I always find her beautiful and it's great to be so close to her.