The Spawn of Lucifer

24

“Does it have any significance to you?” I tread carefully not wanting him to get upset just like his father does anytime I ask him a personal question.

He doesn’t answer for a while but when he does, his face is devoid of any emotion almost like he’s an expert at hiding whatever he’s feeling. “Yes, it does. It’s just a reminder for me to become a better person and start taking responsibilities for my actions despite the shitty actions of my parents.” He says. “I have it tattooed on my back.”

“What makes you say that?” I ask but when he hesitates to answer, I knew I had gone too far. “You don’t have to —”

He cuts me off. “I don’t really have a good relationship with my dad. He expects too much from me and my brother. I understand why he disowned us before, we were a menace and did everything possible to land our ass in jail but that was after my parents got divorced. We may act like we don't care at times but we do. My brother was much more affected than I was and did a lot of horrible things, I guess, as some sort of coping mechanism. I covered up most of it so he didn't get punished." A pause before he continues in a monotonous tone. "My father could have understood us but he didn't. He just raged on and on about how big of a disapointment we were to him and some other bullshit I couldn't care less about. I know he loves us, I'm not a fool, but he never shows it. It's like that love is buried deep down inside of him waiting to be thawed out."

I don't say a word or utter any sound as I listen to him tell me all the things he must have bottled up inside.

"And my mother, she doesn't know that word even if it hits her in the face. That woman is quite foolish. She cares about us but can be stupid most times. That's why I take it upon myself to pull my shit together and be there for my little brother. My parents are the worst but as their kids, we can't help but love them unconditionally."

I ponder on his words with a heavy heart, thinking of my own daughter and how much she despises me for things I've apologized countlessly for.

And in a way, Kamol's right. I know Nellie loves me but she's got this hardened heart that's indifferent to all my effort and tears to ensure her wellbeing. It's obvious she didn't get it from me. She most likely got it from her father, whoever and wherever that piece of shit was.

"I also don't have a good relationship with my daughter." I tell him. "It's all my fault anyway but I'm trying to make amends. She loathes me to the extent that she had to move out of the house to avoid being in the same room as me. I don't blame her, though, but she takes it too far sometimes and I just can't help but wonder if I'm a bad mother."

"No offence but she sounds like an ungrateful brat." He says with a chuckle, trying to lighten up the tension locked up in the air and I smile.

We talk about other things and get to know each other better. I find out that he's a tattooist despite his father's disapproval about it, he's gone to prison a couple times, he was born in Korea while his brother was born in the US; it just so happens that his parents travelled a lot for business purposes.

His favourite food is Kimchi, samgyeopsal; whatever that was, and Pizza, he loves drawing and playing video games.

"Seriously?" I let out a loud laugh and he smirks leaning back on the chair while chewing on a piece of gum he took out from the pocket of his cargo pants.

"Yes. I've dated six girls. Each relationship lasted a month. I can barely count how many girls I've hooked up with." He casually says like it's an everyday routine for him.

I stare at him, flabbergasted. "And I'm guessing your dad didn't approve of your sexual rendezvous."

"He did not but never cared enough to show it. As long as I didn't bring any of the girls to his house, he doesn't really give a damn and I just had to make sure that I don't knock up one of them and become a daddy overnight. Now that is what he won't tolerate." He says with a small laugh and picks up his phone when it rings.