Who Moved My Heart

Chapter 16

He said, "You are such a kind person, a loving person." He said, "I cannot live without you." He said, "I'm trying to live without you, but I have a whole problem doing that."

"I'm looking at everything you do: the way you cook, the way you clean, the way you trust, the way you smell." He said, "Even when you're going to bed at night, you dress like you are going out to dinner."

He said, "I have never caught you in a dull moment or a bad mood, You always look good and smell good; you have that in you, and I'm looking for that, and I cannot get that." So I replied to him, "Do not look for anything you know about me in another lady because that's going to be a problem." 

He then replied, "I know you have to wait on God's answer." He said, "I'm going to wait for you." I said, "Are you going to keep on waiting for me? I don't want to hold you back if you want to go." I told him. He then replied to me, "You are worth every minute of my time." He said, "A woman like you, I will wait for if I have to."

"I love everything about you. I want to walk around in my home, see you there, hug and kiss you on your forehead when I want, make love to you, and sleep a little late in the morning. I want everything. 

I want to come home to you every day, even when I have my bad days or my good days, or when I just miss you and just want to see your beautiful face, that smile, that nice voice of yours telling me it's going to be okay."

"Being funny when I'm tired, making me laugh and I cannot resist you. Hell no I'm not leaving because you are my life so I'm waiting on you.""I know you're one of God's favorites so please go to him and ask him how long more for me, because I need to come home to you every night, and I need a family with you."

"Then one day, I decided to go on a 21-day and night fasting after my previous fast. It was a Monday night right after my long prayer, I took a shower and I went to bed and in the middle of my sleep I felt like I left my home and God, took me somewhere where, then I met with him and  God show me exactly what is going to happen. 

On my way back I did not come back with him. I came back with the person God, replace him  when God gave me the vision that he had moved him and replaced him with someone else. I was devastated; I cried so loud. I picked up the phone just to hear his voice." one last time I still didn't  want to accept this decision that God has made because he is where I wanted to be, but when I called him. That morning, it's like he already knew God's decision.

He said, "God answered your prayer; he showed you that vision, right?" I could not answer. He said, "Where are you?" I said on my way to work. He said, "Stand by the door, I'm on my way." 

I saw him come with his eyes so red, and he grabbed me and he cried, he said to me, "You are one of the women who are very close to God, and if God gave you that vision I know that you will not do anything else, but what God has said."

He asked, "Why is God being unfair to me?" I said I didn't know, the things that were running through my mind. He said, "I cannot not do this; not me." I replied, "I cannot marry you because God will not bless our marriage, and there will be times when things are hard and we are going to need him."

He was so angry that day and I was also. He said, "I am never going to love someone again, but only you, because you took everything from me today, and I truly don't know how I'm going to make it out." I replied to him, "I know you are not happy, but the kids need you."