ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴇᴠɪʟ || ʀᴀᴅɪᴏᴀᴘᴘʟᴇ

• 2 •

"It's a perfect bonding moment!"

"Ah yes, capitalism. Because nothing bad ever happened when capitalism is involved." Angel Dust grabbed four drinks with all of his arms and chugged each one like it was a smoothie. "Seriously, where are you getting your ideas Charlie?"

"I, for one, think it's a great idea!" Alastor dramatically laid a hand on Charlie's shoulder and Lucifer felt like clawing his eyes out.

"That's because you're power hungry." Lucifer remarked, pointing the end of his cane at Alastor's face. Alastor's eye twitched, but otherwise said nothing. "I will gladly play Char Char!"

"The devil did create capitalism."

"Whatever those dumbass human did to come up with this stupid societal construct is not my issue."

"So you're a communist?"

"I'll do whatever my family would need, whether it is paying equal taxes or avoiding taxes altogether."

"How very noble of you."

"I'll show you how noble I am when I shove this metal boat up your fucking ass!"

"Kinky." Angel Dust giggled, Husk shot him a look. Charlie let out a loud sigh and stepped in between the two, like a mother stepping between her squabbling children.

"He started it!" They both retorted in unison, and Vaggie rolled her eyes and skimmed the rules. As she was explain the rules, Niffty ripped the paper from her grasp and gobbled it up, then continued her cleaning.

"Okay, we are just going to wing it, what can go wrong?"

It turned out, that a lot can go wrong if given the chance. With the lack of rules, it really allowed the demons to expand on their idea of capitalism.

"I say, we make a sex dungeon on Mayfair and whoever lands on it has to snog the person on their left."

"Angel if you wanted a kiss, you could've just asked." Husk snorted (who was coincidentally on his left), and Angel Dust gave him the sweetest puppy eyes the spider sinner could muster up. Alastor made a loud gagging noise, before returning to his normal smiling self, and gazed off into the distance until it was his turn. Lucifer rolled the dice and landed on the Community Chest.

"What does this mean?"

"It means you have to do a dare!"

"Angel that's not how it works."

"Stop ruining my fun!" Angel pondered for a moment, before his pout contorted into an evil smirk. "I dare you to stroke Alastor's ears."

The room fell silent, and the tension could be sliced like a three-tier cake. Lucifer was confused, until he glanced over at the deer. The radio demon had a forced smile through gritted teeth, his eye was twitching more than usual and his antlers were slowly growing.

"If you touch me. You're dead."

"Yeah, like you can do anything to me. What's the big deal? Does it make you horny or something?"

"I feel the opposite of horny, I feel murderous."

"Alastor! It's a dare! You have to let him do it, it'll be a great bonding experience!" Charlie pleaded, "do it, for me?" Alastor noticeably loosened.

"Well dearie, if it's for you." The deer bent at his waist, arms behind his back and feet pointed. He tilted his head to show off his ears to Lucifer. Lucifer didn't know whether he should be pissed off or intrigued. He was both. He wasn't scared, the Radio Demon pales in comparison to the King of Hell. Alastor was smart, he wouldn't be so stupid as to attack Lucifer for something so meagre like touching his ears.