Serendipity

Episode #30 : I'll Die Without You

*The song playing through the speakers*

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SCENE 1

Suman and Abhimanyu left in her family's vigilance. She didn't want to be labelled as 'eloped with a guy'. Although, following Rukmani's instructions, she did lie that they were headed to Banaras. Lakhan tried to raise objections but shockingly, Poojan dismissed all and silently allowed them to leave. Even though her relation with her father had suddenly become estranged but somewhere in his eyes, she saw approval for Abhimanyu.

As the taxi went out of her family's sight, she instructed the driver to change route for the railway station. Abhimanyu was quiet beside her throughout the journey, looking out the window. It surprised her that even if she didn't get time to share her mother's plan with him, he was not questioning her. His implicit trust on her was overwhelming and heart touching simultaneously.

Her mother's prayers were working as, when they reached railway station, a train was all set to leave for Patna in ten minutes. Due to cold weather and the area being a village, not many people were travelling which resulted in Abhimanyu easily booking a compartment for the two. It didn't escape Suman's notice how he continuously moved his neck while talking on the counter. She realized with another pang of guilt that he was constantly travelling for a day. Had just reached Ballia then rushed her to the hospital and without any rest, was embarking on another journey.

Sharp at 11:15 PM, the train left the station and started its journey to Patna. It being business class, the compartment was very luxurious. Soft music was playing through the speakers in the ceiling. The staff provided them with new sheets and pillows and took away the used ones by the passengers before them. While Abhimanyu was freshening up, one of the train's kitchen staff member came to pick their order for the dinner. Checking the menu, Suman placed Abhimanyu's favourite available dishes as she was sure he hadn't eaten anything. Just as the guy left, Abhimanyu stepped out of the bathroom.

"I heard voices..." - he had a slight frown on face saying that.

"Yeah I ordered food for you." - she replied softly.

The crease disappeared from his forehead and tension dawned between them again. She turned on the seat, sitting crosslegged, her determination to force him to talk to her rising. But before she could say anything, he was sitting before her in a flash. One leg crossed while other dangling from the berth. He was so close that his knee was touching hers.

"Why ?" - he asked and while doing so, his voice shook. Heavy with emotions. He placed his hands at her jeans clad knees and pulled her closer, making her gasp. They were nose-to-nose now and she found only one emotion in his eyes.

Love.

All the anger, complaints, hurt had drained away. It was just love. Pure, unconditional and fierce.

"Bao Ji asked me to choose either him or you." - she whispered.

"So you decided to end your life ?" - he asked, his voice getting thicker.

"He was trying to guilt trip me Abhi that was unacceptable. And I can't live without you so I thought-"

"So you thought I can live without you." - he cut her off hoarsely.

She went quiet, swallowing to control the sudden moisture in eyes.

"You didn't stop to think for once that what will happen to me if something happened to you ? I'm still stuck in that moment when you fell limp in my arms and I realized you have swallowed sleeping pills. My mind is torturing me with the thought of what would have happened if I had reached any later..." - his voice broke and he trailed off, looking away.

Tears fell from his eyes and her hand, on reflex, shot up in time to catch them on her palm. Her heart was bursting out of her chest at his pain and the graveness of her act settled on her. She had already realized in the hospital but now it actually established in her head how foolish she had been. Suicide was never a solution to any problem. Instead, she would have just left her loved ones with a lifetime of pain and suffering. A wound that would have never healed.

He took her hand and placed over his heart. Her eyes grew wide as she felt his abnormally fast heartbeat.

"It's not slowing down ever since. It's beating for YOU Suman. Don't make it stop-"

She placed her finger on his lips, shushing from saying further as she couldn't bear even the thought of his heart stopping. Breaking into sobs, she curled her arms around his chest and hugged him tightly. His arms tightened around her just as fiercely, soaking her warmth, her fragrance, her presence that she was there. With him. Alive and his.

"I am sorry Abhi. I... am SO sor..ryyy.." - she choked while crying. Her head was tucked perfectly under his chin and he repeatedly dropped kisses on her hair while squeezing her in his arms.

They remained like that for a good half hour. His weeping and her sobbing had subsided by now and were breathing in peace.

"Please don't ever leave me." - his quiet whisper broke the silence.

Noor e Jahaan, aur noor e mohabbat,
Dono jure, tujhse piya,

She slowly loosened her arms to lean back just enough to look at him. Bloodshot, puffy eyes, tired and scared, met her.

Pagal ya jogi, mujhko kaho tum,
Haan mera ishq, sabse juda,

"Believe me, a life without you is impossible now." - he continued, his eyes welling up again. "I can face anything, can take on any problem if you are with me. Just... don't..." - he swallowed as his voice thickened again.

Teri hi khatir, lun sau janam mein,
Chahey ho jo bhi bhalaaa..

Suman's heart broke. He had kept his heart bare before her, totally vulnerable. It was a beautifully painful feeling.

"I can not even imagine Abhi. However wrong my act was but it is proof enough that I can leave this world but not you." - she whispered, cupping his face. "'I love you' doesn't even cover what I feel for you. It's something wildly intense, oceanic deep and fiery uncontrollable." - her tone was strong as she confessed that despite having a soft, surrendered smile on face.

Na main hun aashiq, na main deewana,
Keh do mujhe jo piyaaa..

Tears fell from his eyes again that she brushed away with her thumbs. She didn't blink and continued staring dead into his eyes. Giving him all the surety he needed, offering the sincerity of her 'forever'.

Slowly, she tilted her head and pressed her lips with his. He fell back on the berth with her atop him, his eyes closing shut in peace. Their lips languidly brushed against each other. In sync. Like their hearts that were calmly beating in sync with each other. For each other.

Tera mera hai pyaar amar,
Tu chahey toh qadmon mein sar rakhdun,

She gently broke apart and pulled back to look at him. He was looking up at her through his damp lashes, eyes holding nothing but surrender that caused her breath to hitch.

"Like I had said, you have all the authority over me Suman. Do whatever you want but don't scare me like that again. I'll die without you."

Yeh jeevan kya, gar mangey tu,
Meri jaan nazar kardun...

Her heartbeat became erratic again. He held her still in an intense eye-lock. And as if a magnet was pulling her, her head lowered again, eyes fluttering shut before they were kissing again.

Yeh jeevan kya, gar mangey tu,
Meri jaan nazar kardun...

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Author's Note : I am OBSESSED with this song lately! 🫠