Found you (On Hold)

Jealousy

Stopping at the hospital gate, I feel the need to puke but I manage without doing it. There's chaos inside my brain, completely opposite scenario than the hospital lobby. It's silent, like it's mourning. I ask the receptionist in which room my father could be. She tells me to go to the I.C.U.

When I reach there, I see my mom, sitting on a steel bench, crying. I rush towards her and she stands up when she sees me. I hug her tightly and start crying. I don't remember crying like this ever before.

She holds me in her arms for a while. She tells me that dad's stable now.

"I didn't knew where you were." She says sobbing and wiping my tears from my face.

"I went to Tyler's. I'm so sorry mom." I can't seem to help the tears, they keep coming out.

"It's not your fault. It all happened so suddenly. I went blank. I was so scared." She covers her face in her hands.

"I'm here now, mom. Can I meet him?"

"Not now honey. The doctor is coming back in a few minutes. Then you can ask him. But they said he's fine." She comforts me. I nod, unable to talk and she hugs me tightly.

We sit on the same steel chair. The fear that's present is not in my mind. It's something that I can actually feel inside, in my chest and stomach. This sinking feeling is haunting. I'm so scared for my dad. I can't say that to mom.

When doctor arrives, he informs us that it truly was an attack but a mild one and we need to take care of him. I see my dad from outside the room. He looks at me and gives me a smile. I sit on that steel bench again. I look around and wonder why they make hospitals so scary. People should feel at ease here, not get more anxious.

****

I established that day that I hated hospitals. I wished I never had to visit them again. That was a harsh time of my life. Now I'm here, at this hospital for Mahi.

I keep telling myself it's a psychiatric hospital. But the surroundings are similar. White walls and ceilings. Black and white marble floor smelling of disinfectant. It's increasing my anxiety. I try not to think about it and think about Mahi instead.

What if she's crying again?

Thinking of her crying makes me stand up and realize that thinking about her crying is more difficult than thinking of my problems.

I'm about to knock when I hear some sounds coming out of the room. It's someone laughing so I sit back down in my initial position.

Within seconds the door is opened and Mahi comes out first and then some guy, a goddamn good looking guy, follows her after. He says something in her ear and she seems too comfortable with him.

When she said she was going to meet her boss, I thought it was going to be a female, some old lady in a hospital uniform with withered skin, artificial teeth, smiling like she's doing a favour to the world.

I was obviously wrong. Instead, he's a guy with features that girls want to look at. And they are both smiling and laughing like they've been friends from a long time. Why does he have to be a lookalike of Ryan Reynolds?? Why???

"Go to the rounds doc. We all have work to do." She says to him and he leaves in the other direction.

She did not introduce me to him. I don't know why I am feeling this way. It's almost like I'm jealous of the stranger.

"I got a week off to work things out." She tells me cheerfully.

"See... I told you." I can't think of anything better to say.

Last dreaded 15 minutes and now seeing her with her boss is adding cherry on the top. I look at her boss and he's looking at us.

I try to think before I act but give up as I feel my emotions takeover and hold Mahi's hand and take her out of the hospital. She doesn't stop or asks why I'm holding her hand. Somehow her not asking any questions is a relief.

I'm acting weird but I won't lie to myself by saying that I don't need Mahi with me at the moment with all those memories fresh in my mind.

[I've entered 'Found you' into wattys and most of you know about them. They are annual wattpad awards, so if you could just please share, vote and comment, that would be lovely. Thanks for the support. It's highly appreciated. And as always, inbox me the suggestions. :):) ]