Love is not in the equation | Taegyu

𝑇𝑤𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑦 𝑡𝑤𝑜

⋆｡˚. ੈ.✾. ⋆｡˚. ੈ ⋆｡˚. ੈ

𝑇𝑤𝑜 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑙𝑑𝑠 𝑎𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑡

⋆｡˚. ੈ ⋆｡˚. ੈ.✾. ⋆｡˚. ੈ

Sieun's very first memory of his older brother Taehyun was watching him on the stage with a violin in hand. He remembered sitting on his mother's lap, and their whole family was there to watch him perform.

"Sieun-ah, this is who your older brother Taehyun is" was what his mother had whispered in his ear. 

Under the spotlight, stood the 10 year old boy alone. Calm, confident and assertive. That was the feeling that Sieun now could describe he had felt when he saw Taehyun. 

His older brother was a great performer. He played the violin with such fluidity and zero technical faults which managed to earn a standing applause from the audience. And the first emotion Sieun had felt towards Taehyun was admiration. However, Sieun had always felt something was amiss in the violin performance. 

Not long after, he learnt that Taehyun had quit playing the violin because he got bored and didn't like it. 

Sieun remembered Taehyun doing horseback riding too. He was there for Taehyun's first ever lesson. 

"Sieun-ah, watch your brother closely" was what his father had proudly said with confidence.

Taehyun had gotten onto the sadle with ease, the view of him sitting straight up with the reins in his hands felt so natural that it was hard to believe it was his first time. Again, Taehyun was so composed during the whole process, and the horse never once showed hostility or annoyance. 

He remembered the trainer to be completely impressed by Taehyun's display of understanding and control that he kept praising him, calling him a prodigy. 

However, Sieun never saw Taehyun smiled once throughout the whole experience. 

Sieun remembered Taehyun to be what others call a "genius", exceeding expectations no matter where he went. People would suck up to him, trying to get to his good side. Taehyun was always the center of attention. There was never a time Taehyun was alone in public. There was always someone with him, or eyes following him everywhere. 

Taehyun was constantly being watched, some with admiration and love, but some with jealousy and hatred. People waited for his downfall, to try and take advantage of him. But Taehyun was nearly invincible. There wasn't a single time that he slipped and fell. He was always standing strong with an air of the untouchable. 

He was like a lone undefeated king looking down upon on others from his throne that was covered with thorns and unbreakable force. That was the image Taehyun had created for himself. 

But that wasn't who Taehyun truly was.

Taehyun was not the emotionless person who cared for nothing but himself. To Sieun, Taehyun was a caring older brother who would always smile genuinely for his family and close friends. 

People said Taehyun lacked emotions, and that was far from the truth. Taehyun might be the scariest, but he wasn't void of emotions. He cared for his siblings, and Sieun dared to say he was always the first one to offer help. Sieun just didn't understand why Taehyun wouldn't do the same to others, or why he would distant himself from forming all sorts social attachments. Sieun couldn't deny that he was warm but cold all at the same time. 

Sieun had watched and looked up to Taehyun growing up, but even as a family member, he couldn't quite understand him too.

Something seemed to have changed lately though. Sieun had first noticed the shift in his demeanor and aura. His older brother used to be so unapproachable, as if there was an impenetrable fortress guarding him. Now, he had let his guard down, the air around him had turned softer and rounded. Even his posture had changed slightly from how he used to always be standing straight and alert to relaxed, occasionally slumping and folding his shoulders in when he sat.