A Multi-ship Story **in Editing*

*Help*

"Wow! That's crazy. Talk about the worst luck!" Lily exclaimed when Lexi told her all that happened that day.

"I know right?" Lexi laughed a little before she turned her attention back to the vegetables they were preparing for dinner. Jenny had asked the girls to help, and they chatted while they chopped up the veggies.

Gibbs came in, looking kind of tired from the day. He sat at the table and sighed.

"How was work, Dad?" Lily asked him.

He just grunted in response.

Lexi asked, "Did anything cool happen after I left?"

"Not unless you think a bunch of dead ends are cool." His tone had a rather sharp edge to it, and Lexi thought she detected a glare.

She turned back to her chopping, a little more focused this time. Her eyebrows pulled together as she felt anger rising up. Why did he have to come and ruin the whole mood? She and Lily were finally having a good time together, and he just had to come in here all tired and make everything weird and tense again.

Lexi could've screamed from the frustration. She stopped chopping for a moment and closed her eyes tightly. Why was he even in here? Did he just want to spread the negativity? It's not like he was the only one having a bad day.

Before Lexi knew it, she wasn't facing the counter anymore. Her hand was clutching the knife harder than she needed to, and she was staring at Gibbs. Lily was focused on her tasks, Gibbs was looking at something in the paper, and Jenny was focused on dinner as well. No one could stop Lexi as she changed how she held the knife to the optimal position for attack.

Gibbs flashed his eyes upward and met Lexi's. The sudden eye contact brought Lexi's mind back into her body. She dropped the knife and put a hand to her mouth, horrified at what she was ready to do.

"Lexi!" Lily jumped back from the knife clattering on the floor. When she saw the upset look Lexi had, she changed her shock to curiosity. "Are you okay, Lex?"

Lexi glanced to Lily, then to Jenny, then to Gibbs. All of them were staring at her. She could imagine how they would look at her if they knew what she was about to try. She was pretty sure Gibbs already knew, but she couldn't read his expression.

She lowered her hand from her mouth slightly and tried to open it to say something, but nothing came out. In the next moment, she was dashing out the front door.

Outside. She had to get outside to fresh air. That would help. She went to the driveway and moved to a lying position. She stared at the sky, which was starting to get a purple tone to it as the sun went down. She closed her eyes tightly, trying to answer the question circling in her brain. What is wrong with me?

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Her eyes popped open a few minutes later when she heard footsteps coming up to her. Gibbs stood, staring down at her. Neither said anything for a moment, then he sat down next to her on the driveway, his elbows resting on his knees.

"I think we need to talk," was all he said.

Lexi sighed heavily and sat up, copying his posture. "I think so.."

Gibbs only looked straight ahead, while Lexi looked at him.

"Gibbs, I- something is wrong with me..." She tried to stop the shaking of her voice. "I- I can't feel anything. If I do, everything goes really bad..."

He shifted his head to glance at her. Now she was the one looking straight ahead. Her shaking had somewhat stopped, and she continued in a very monotonous, dead tone.

"If I get mad, I get angry. If I get angry, I get furious. And when that happens, I don't have control anymore. It happens when I'm scared, too. Like today in the elevator, I was terrified. And it didn't make me angry, but my brain wasn't there for a while. It was back in the cell they kept me in... and when I get angry, I think I go there again... and that's why, just now, I tried to-" she seemed to lose her composure now, shaking again, "I tried to... kill you."

Gibbs was still looking at her when she turned to meet his gaze. She stared at him for a moment, giving her forming tears a moment to subside, before she almost whispered, "I'm sorry..."

Gibbs watched for a moment as she wiped her eyes and took a deep breath. "It's not your fault, Lex..."

Lexi's composure dropped entirely. She sobbed once, burying her face into her hands. Her body shook as she cried. Gibbs didn't waste time in pulling her against him.

Although Lexi wasn't used to affection of any kind from Gibbs, she melted into his embrace instantly. He rubbed her shoulder, and she stayed leaning against him for several minutes until her tears had seemingly passed.

"I'll talk to Jenny tonight. We'll get you help."

"I already tried therapy." Lexi sniffed. "I'm supposedly better, remember?"

"There's no shame in needing a little extra Help."

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