Veiled Desires of the Crown

Chapter Nineteen

Happy reading!

I looked at her as a friend until i realized i love her

~Burhan

The cold air of the palace corridors hit me as I briskly walked away from Burhan. My heart was still pounding with anger and confusion. How could he expect me to just accept everything after his shocking revelation? My thoughts raced, trying to make sense of the chaos that had become my life.

How could I have been so blind? How could Burhan, the man I had trusted, deceive me in such a way? The weight of the revelation bore down on me, and I struggled to make sense of the shattered pieces of my reality.

Before I could reach my previous chamber, Burhan caught up to me, his hand reaching out to grip my arm firmly. I squirmed, attempting to break free, but he held me tightly. With a determined look, he guided me towards my old chamber, pushing the door open and closing it behind us.

Leaning against the closed door, Burhan's grip on me tightened. Our eyes locked in a silent struggle, a battlefield of unspoken emotions. In the charged atmosphere, our breaths mingled, creating an invisible tether between us. Unable to bear the intensity, i  wiggled once more, breaking the intense stare.

"Leave me!"

 Burhan's voice cut through the air, harsh and commanding, " For God's sake stop Noor!"

Glaring at him I stopped as he held me by my shoulders against the door.

"Please, Noor, let me explain," he pleaded, his voice tinged with desperation.

I scoffed, my bitterness rising to the surface. "Explain? What more could you possibly say? You played with my feelings, manipulated my choices, and now you want to explain?"

Burhan, a heavy sigh escaping his lips. "I understand that what I did was unforgivable. I never intended to hurt you, Noor. I just didn't want to lose you."

Losing patience, I stared directly in his eyes , my eyes ablaze with frustration. "You should have thought about that before weaving this web of lies. I don't even know who you are anymore. Was any part of our friendship real, or was it all a charade to trap me into this marriage?"

He winced at my words, and for a moment, I saw a glimpse of the guilt he carried. "Noor, I care about you more than you can imagine. But my position, my responsibilities – I felt trapped, and I made a terrible decision."

I couldn't say anything else, i was exhausted mentally and physically but he took my silence as my submission.

"Come let's go back to our chamber" He held my hand and proceeded to open the door.

"I am not going with you!" 

"Noor," he said, his eyes searching mine. "You can't leave. That is your new chamber, our chamber. You are now the wife of the Sultan of the empire."

I glared at him, the anger still burning within me. "I never asked for any of this, Burhan. If you're truly sorry, then leave. Divorce me, and let me go."

Burhan shook his head, his expression firm. "No, Noor. I can't do that. I will make amends, but leaving you is not an option."

I scoffed, "Amends? How do you plan to make amends for deceiving me, for playing with my life?"

Burhan took a deep breath, his grip on me softening. "I'll do whatever it takes to make things right, but you can't leave. We're going back to our chamber."

He held me again, guiding me back through the palace halls to the room I now shared with him. As we entered, I quickly freed my hand and moved away from him, the space between us a tangible barrier of resentment.

Burhan, without acknowledging my resistance, said, "You can change and freshen up. It's been a long day." He motioned towards the luxurious hamam attached to the chamber.

I glared at his back as he spoke, but begrudgingly followed his suggestion. The hamam was opulent, adorned with intricate tiles and adorned with golden fixtures. It was triple the size of my previous hamam. The warmth of the water eased the tension in my muscles, but my mind remained a battlefield of conflicting emotions.

After freshening up, I changed into a simple tea-pink frock, discarding the heavy gown that seemed to weigh me down. When I emerged, I found Burhan already changed into comfortable clothes, moving towards the bed. If he thinks he is sharing the bed with me, he is highly mistaken.

"I'm not sleeping on the same bed as you," I asserted, my voice holding a firm and unyielding tone stopping him in his tracks.

Burhan's expression transformed into one of bewilderment. "What do you mean?"

"Exactly as I said," I responded, unwavering. "You're not sharing the bed with me. Find somewhere else."

A disbelieving laugh escaped Burhan, his disbelief echoing in the air. "This is my room, and I'm the Sultan. Where am I supposed to sleep if not in my own bed?"

I gestured toward the carpeted floor. "The floor looks comfortable enough."

Burhan raised his eyebrows in shock, but before he could protest, a thought crossed my mind. What if my defiance led to him treating me poorly? Men like him didn't take orders lightly. He is the sultan after all. A hint of fear swept through me, and I cleared my throat, reluctantly telling him,

"Fine you can sleep wherever you want."

As I moved towards the adjacent room, my eyes fell upon a  couch strategically placed in the corner. It seemed like the perfect escape from the tangled mess that was now my life. With each step I made a conscious decision to distance myself as much as possible from Burhan.

The hard texture of the couch didn't feel welcoming but i still lowered myself on to it. Closing my eyes, i took a deep breath pretending to be unaffected by the whirlwind of events that had taken place today.

The air in the room shifted as I heard the rhythmic approach of Burhan's footsteps. Despite the sound, I maintained my facade, and kept my eyes closed.

"Noor," his voice carried a hint of concern, reaching out to me even as I chose to ignore it. "Come back to the bed. It's not right for you to sleep on the couch."

I remained silent, my closed eyes shielding me from the expressions etched on his face. As he persisted, insisting that I move to the bed, a sigh escaped my lips. Reluctantly, I agreed to his request, and moved towards the bed, my steps deliberate.

Lying down on the comfortable bed I allowed the comforter to envelop me as I settled onto the cool sheets. Burhan retreated to another part of the room, and in the stillness that followed, I couldn't escape the storm of emotions that raged within me.

Surprised, I saw him return carrying thick sheets which he placed down on the floor beside the bed, as he dropped down on them.

The weight of anger pressed upon my chest, intertwined with regret and a lingering sense of defiance. I stole a glance at Burhan, who seemed to navigate the room with a heaviness that mirrored my own conflicted feelings.

His eyes met mine briefly, and I could sense a mixture of remorse and uncertainty. It was a silent exchange, a battlefield of unspoken words. Unable to take it anymore I turned away from him.

I lay beneath the comforter feeling the room envelope in a hushed ambiance. The sounds of our breathing were the only thing breaking the thick tense silence. Both of us stayed awake for hours. After a long time I felt myself relax as sleep enveloped me reluctantly.

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