A Saphael Alphabet

Jealousy

Simon slammed the door behind him as he entered the hotel. He leaned his back against it and closed his eyes, catching his breath, not due to the physical exertion, but because of his own anxiety. Finally, he was able to let out a deep breath, sighing in relief. The sun had already begun to rise, and it had been an extremely close call.

"Where have you been?"

Startled, Simon opened his eyes to see Raphael seated on one of the golden sofas, watching him.

"G-d, Raph, you scared me!" Simon exclaimed, walking further into the room.

The fledging's comment was dismissed with an eyeroll from the older vampire.

"I asked you a question," Raphael reminded.

Simon froze for a moment. Raphael seemed pissed, but it was that quiet anger that stirred just below the surface of a calm demeanor, and that was somehow even more terrifying. It also took Simon by surprise, as he was not entirely sure why the other was even so angry to begin with. Raphael was constantly bemoaning about how irritating he found Simon. Not to mention that he always had such a short fuse during their training sessions and seemed to view Simon as nothing more than a burden. Why would he even care if Simon burned to a crisp?

"Out. I was out," Simon replied, nervously

The ambiguity of his statement only served to rile Raphael up.

"Dios mío! I'm not doing this with you all day!" he snapped as he stood up and began to walk toward the other.

Simon shrugged.

"Pandemonium. I went to Pandemonium," he finally answered.

Raphael shook his head as he came even closer, not buying it.

"Pandemonium closed a few hours ago," he pointed out, matter-of-factly. "So, I'll ask you one more time: Where. Were. You?"

Simon swallowed thickly. He found Raphael extremely intimidating, but, at the same time, his close proximity made Simon feel extremely grateful for the fact that he could no longer feel heat, and his cheeks could no longer turn red. Raphael only ever stood that close as an intimidation tactic. Simon knew that, but every time it happened, it still made Simon's brain short circuit.

"Okay, alright, so I did go to Pandemonium. Then this warlock guy, Pierre, offered to buy me a drink. We sort of hit it off and then one thing let to another...I kind of lost track of time at his place. But that's all. So, I don't know what you think happened, but I didn't do anything bad or break any of your rules or anything. Promise," Simon explained.

Raphael's demeanor shifted. The anger was still there, as plain as day, but there was something else there as well that Simon couldn't quite read, and that drove him mad. Raphael was often hard to read, so that was nothing new. Still, Simon always found himself curious about what was going on in his mind.

"What I think happened is that you were stupid enough to almost get yourself over a one night stand. You really had me up worried about you while you were running off with some cabrón you met at a club!" Raphael snapped.

"So? What do you care anyway? I bet you would've thrilled if I didn't make it back in time!" Simon retorted.

Another too subtle shift in Raphael's expression had Simon immediately wishing he could back what he had just said. There was a moment of silence that passed, and Simon had to actively resist the urge to fill it with some pointless rambling. He always hated silence.

"You know, after everything that's happen, I took you in. I gave you a home. I've been training you. I've taken care of you. Not your Shadowhunters, not Peter, me," Raphael said, his tone icy.

"Pierre," Simon corrected, his voice small and pathetic.

Admittedly, Simon was kind of intentionally pushing Raphael's buttons with that one. He always knew exactly how, and it was part why he drove Raphael so crazy all the time.

"Fine. You know what? Why don't you go run off to your precious Pierre and see how that works out for you!" Raphael snapped.

Simon shrugged.

"Maybe, I will," he replied defiantly before making his way to the door.

He grabbed the doorknob before remembering that the sun was out. He let go of the doorknob and turned back around.

"Okay, not, like, right now, but maybe, I will, you know, later, when it's dark out. But then, maybe, I will," Simon said.

Raphael rolled his eyes.

"You are such a pain in the ass," he said.

"Me? I'm a pain in the ass? Seriously? Why are you even being like this? What are you, jealous or something?" Simon exclaimed. It was the first time during that encounter that he raised his voice, as he really wasn't one to yell, but he had absolutely had it with Raphael.

He was expecting some snarky comeback from Raphael. Maybe even an insult in Spanish that he'd need to google later on. What he wasn't expecting was silence or the way that Raphael's entire body tensed. Once again, it was subtle, but Simon noticed. He always noticed Raphael.

In contrast to the other, Simon's expression softened as the weight of the moment hit him. He had made the jealousy comment half-heartedly in an attempt to get under Raphael's skin. He didn't expect it to mean something.

"Oh shit," Simon said, his voice low. "I'm right, aren't I?"

Raphael covered up how he was feeling with another eye roll, something he did particularly frequently whenever Simon was around.

"What you are is insufferable," Raphael snarked.

His walls were back up. He switched it back on so easily, but there was the moment in between, the moment that Simon was determined to hold on to.

"I think you mean irresistible," Simon said with a stupid, smug grin on his face.

"And you've clearly had too much to drink. Go get some sleep, Lewis," Raphael retorted.

Simon sighed.

"Fine," he said, beginning to make his way to the stairs.

He stopped for a moment by Raphael.

"But, just so you know, I only hookup with other people, because the guy I'm really into has never shown any interest," he said coyly.

With an eye roll, Raphael replied, "I really don't need any updates on your love life."

Simon chuckled slightly.

"I'm literally talking about you," he explained.

Raphael's eyes widened in surprise.

"Oh," he said softly.

Simon let out an exasperated sigh.

"Seriously? I know being emotionally closed off is sort of your brand, but is 'oh' really all you have to say right now?" he exclaimed.

Raphael looked away for a moment before looking at Simon this time, his expression dark. He came closer, slowly, until there was hardly any space between them. Simon was lucky that he didn't need to breathe, because he couldn't even if he tried, and he nearly melted when he felt the other's hand gently grip his wrist.

"Maybe, I was...a little...jealous," Raphael whispered.

Simon looked at Raphael's mouth as he spoke, and noticed that his fangs were out, and he had to fight his own from dropping. It was a battle he lost when Raphael's other hand gently cupped his face.

When Raphael spoke again, his voice was low and rough, almost a growl.

"I don't want anyone else touching you. I want you all to myself."

Oh.