deceit • Han Seojun x Kang Soojin

57. khairiyat (well-being)

"Don't fuck around - especially not with me." He ran his hand through his hair, eyeing Soojin with disregard and disgust. "I never thought you'd be so fucking desperate - to hurt yourself - to get my attention."

Soojin sighed. She wasn't able to understand him and neither did she understood herself. Was Seojun pushing her away or was she so low on self esteem that she could let Seojun walk over her so easily.

"Why are you - "

"You should show the wound to a doctor," Seojun did not meet her eyes, looking everywhere but at her. Soojin looked up, wondering how she'd be able to break those huge walls he had around himself. "Or don't, does not bother me." With that he walked out of the room, without turning back, making Soojin sit back with a sigh. 

Seojun had pillars of iron and steel as walls around him, she could see how hard he had built those themselves and as a builder of walls herself - Soojin knew it must have been so hard. So lonely and so - scary. 

_

The meeting concluded swiftly - Mr. Choi had addressed Seojun for the advertisement shoot they had the next day before their Busan concert - and the tension between the duo was rather noticeable by the lot. Soojin was in her bloodied clothes, having no time to change and no money to buy herself from one of these fancy shops - until Mr. Choi surprised her with a parcel. 

He had bought her a change of clothes - the most expensive one in the shop - and saved her any sort of embarrassment from the stained clothes. When asked, he said that it was the 'easiest' thing the saleswoman could grab for him and avoided speaking anything about the money. Soojin did not have much of a choice either and obliged to change into the formal attire Mr. Choi got her.

It was a duel color dress - grey and white - buttoned down with no sleeves. It fit her perfectly and looked really - really - expensive. She tried getting one of the saleswoman to tell her the price but they would not budge - wonder why. Nevertheless, with the black long boots which apparently 'came with the dress' made her look a different person than she was before.

More like the Kang Soojin she was once upon a time. 

The moment she stepped out with that dress and the attitude that came with it, Soojin could feel the hot gazes of people - particularly men - on her and she knew she should have stayed in her stained clothes. She was not used to attention, she never was the one for the limelight and would never imagine how Seojun could handle all of the fame. Although, she did notice how Mr. Choi - who never looked up from his laptop - looked at her for a solid two seconds. 

And then he went back to type furiously on his laptop.

Two seconds was ten minutes in Mr. Choi's world. 

But when Han Seojun glanced at her - seated across from Mr. Choi with his manager - he could not take his eyes off her. There was a hint of both awe and anger in those hazel eyes. Even so, Soojin did not look at him, she really needed some time off with the way Seojun kept brushing her off. She wanted to pretend that everything was okay but it still and will always sting whenever Seojun acted cold towards her. 

She ignored Seojun - who still gawked at her with no shame - and sat besides Mr. Choi, helping him with the documents and files. 

"You will need to arrive at the studio - 9 am." Mr. Choi said as Seojun reacted in no way - not even a nod as his eyes kept their focus on Soojin - the girl who was as inattentive as him. "Han Seojun - shi, is everything okay?" 

Soojin looked up from the laptop to meet Seojun's eyes - the cold and dark eyes - for a split second until Seojun broke their eye-lock. He faced Mr. Choi, nodding in agreement - despite hearing nothing. Nodding and humming a yes was his go-to mantra, because he never really paid attention to anything.