The Scent of Roses || Coriolanus Snow

Chapter XII

Class was horrifically dull that morning. The lack of interest could've been due to the nature of the lesson or because your mind was occupied elsewhere.

You had a rather intense dream about Coriolanus last night, taking the memories of you both tossing through the sheets and adding a bit more flare. You'd woken up in a cold sweat, mortified that you could conjure up such a dream, especially about him.

Cedar had made you feel that way before, the dreams and the feelings that sent you wanting more. You'd spent almost every night at his home, sneaking past his parents and blaring the stereo loud enough so nothing could be heard.

Sometimes, you'd miss the way his strong hands would feel along your bare back, the way he kissed you unapologetically when no one was around. But that was all it was to him: actions with no meaning and promises never kept. In public, he acted like he didn't know you. In private, he begged for every ounce of your being.

You shook off the thoughts, returning your focus to the lecture. Falling behind in your studies was not something you could afford.

Today's subject in your Distribution and Trade class was agriculture cultivation in District 11, learning the logistics of why the District was chosen for its fruitful soil, miles of open land, and proper dry and wet seasons. The whole purpose of this class was to teach why each District was assigned its primary distributive resource and how those resources benefitted the Capital. Everything linked back to satisfying the Capital. How typical.

You snapped back into focus, trying to keep your mind out of rebellion. You had never cast so much doubt on the homeland you were raised in, but after seeing such vile and inhumane acts, it was hard to defend.

Finally, you were dismissed from class and given a rather lengthy reading assignment for the evening. You jotted down the work in your planner, mapping out the tasks you had to do for the week. Not as much as usual, but that was hardly anything to complain about.

The halls were packed as students shuffled to their next class. Or, they were busy finding a friend, partner, and possible future ones. You swerved through the crowd, trying to find a bathroom so you could freshen up.

After pushing your way through a few people, you made it inside the restroom. There were a few girls in line, or they were standing around the sink gossiping. The second they saw you there, they shuffled out the door, leaving you entirely alone. Or so you thought until a girl walked out of one of the stalls.

You stood frozen for a moment. Regretfully, you looked highly suspicious as a familiar face appeared.

"Hi, Alice." You tried to make some small talk, but she awkwardly smiled at you, giving a rather timid hi in return. She strolled to the sink, washing her hands quietly as you headed past her.

"I was going to congratulate you on your tributes' victory, but I felt it was insensitive." You paused at her words before you entered a stall. "At first, I was envious of you and the others who placed at the top of the class and received such an honor..." She paused momentarily, her mouth becoming a grave for her tongue. "Now, I'm not so sure."

You turned around to face her, but she was staring into the depths of the sink. "Did you feel it was an honor to serve the Capital like that?" She asked you, her lips quivering. If you didn't know any better, you'd think she was crying.

"It was a privilege," you answered somberly, discontent with any answer you could offer. "I wouldn't call it an honor. Honor would not make me feel the regret that I do."

She nodded slowly as a loud slam sounded from the bathroom door. You both turned to see Cedar, out of breath and exhausted, standing at the entrance to the bathroom.

Alice screamed immediately. You stood stone-faced. He began shushing you both, trying not to cause public panic or risk anyone hearing from outside.

"Shhhh, it's okay. I just need to talk to her." He asserted, gesturing in your direction.

You turned, grabbing Alice and quieting her down as she eventually agreed to stay calm, giving you reassuring nods.

You looked back to Cedar, Alice's eyes following yours. His hands ran through his hair, almost as if trying to rip the individual strands out of his head.

"Cedar, what the hell!" You gritted your teeth at him, hoping no one could hear you outside. "You cannot be in here. Someone could see you."

Alice began panting heavily like she was on the verge of a panic attack. You rested a hand on her shoulder to console her, but your attempts weren't helping much.

He shook his head. "I checked before I came in. No one saw me or will come in here."

"Well, you clearly didn't do a good job!" You protested. "Alice doesn't need to be scarred in a public bathroom. Why didn't you just come to my apartment to talk?" you protested, blindsided by the lengths he would go to talk to you.

Cedar began to massage his temples, frustrated with something, but he had yet to clue you in on what it was. "I did go to your apartment yesterday, just so I talk to you," he scoffed, his face burning hot with rage. "Tell me why I saw Coriolanus Snow walking down the steps from your room?"

Your eyes widened in shock, feeling Alice's eyes also fell onto you. "Why does it matter?" You questioned, praying he didn't speak
further in front of someone else. "He was dropping off a letter from the Academy. It's his job!"

"You think I'm supposed to believe that?" Cedar slammed his hand into the bathroom stall, causing you and Alice to flinch. One of the top hinges came undone, collapsing the door onto its side. He breathed heavily, immense frustration in the tone of his voice. "How long have you been fucking him?"

Alice's eyes darted back and forth between the two of you. She was stuck in disbelief as she practically fell into the corner of the room, trying to isolate herself. You stood frozen, unable to move or talk. Your lips quivered as Cedar became more enraged, his eyes swelling up with tears.

"I- I'm not doing that with him. You're the only person I've ever..." You looked to Alice, hoping she was covering her ears at this point. "You know that, Cedar."

You tried to reach out for him, but he pulled away, burying his head in his hands. "Why would you even accuse me of such a thing?" You pleaded with him, hoping he'd offer you some sort of explanation.

"No one said anything," he finally spat out, still shaking his head. "But I know you, and the look on his face as he walked down those stairs... that wasn't the look of dropping off a letter."

He shook his head. You could see the grief on his face as he was trying to piece it all together. Every second he stayed silent, you could feel your heart breaking and your throat caving in on itself.

"Cedar, please-" You reached out for him again, but he shook you off, causing you to flinch at his dismissal.

"Forget it," he choked as his voice cracked. He stormed out of the bathroom without another word, leaving you frozen.

Your tears stung your face. Why... how could that happen? He came out of nowhere, so filled with confusion and hatred. How could Cedar do this to you? Why couldn't he just be mature and handle this in private? Why did he find it appropriate to defame you in a public bathroom, especially in front of a classmate?

Alice finally turned around after the noise had ceased. You went to say something, anything, to keep her quiet about all of this. She didn't need to know that or to be thrown in the middle of it. You did feel horrible for her being in that situation, but you felt even worse about how she could spread that information to the world.

"I won't say anything." Alice was short in her words, refusing to look up at you. Tears streamed down your face, a violent feeling of nausea ripping apart your stomach.

"I-I'm so sorry," you protested, still at a loss for words. A girl you had barely been allowed to meet or talk to, now knew some of the most intimate parts of your life. She had all the power to ruin you, but she had promised her silence before you had even asked for it.

Alice finally looked up at you, offering a small expression of understanding. She bit her lip for a moment before speaking again. "Do you wanna go grab lunch?" she asked with a simple smile.