Eli's POV
To the first boy I fell in love with:
You were my sun on every cloudy day that passed while you were gone. I regret not being there to tell you everything that happened while you were away. Please trust me when I say I didn't want to take the coward's way out, but there was no other way to save everyone else. I will put everyone first before myself. Always.
A lot has changed if you haven't already figured that out. I became a wolf the night you left. I barely had time to mourn you before I had MANY responsibilities to uphold, not only as Alpha of my pack but unifying all of us together for a greater cause. I thought killing Asmodeus tainted my innocence, but it was just the start. I killed two wolves who came after me on my first night as Alpha. I will never be the girl you fell in love with, but I'm assuming you aren't the same boy I fell in love with, either. Lucifer talks about how Hell changed him and how time works differently there. I can only hope from here on out, the light will shine for you in the darkest times.
Under loves heavy burden do I sink. We're definitely star-crossed, but I will never forget what it felt like to be in love with you. Even if I was naive to think you were my soulmate, you are still one of the loves of my life. Nothing can ever change that. We share two halves of grace; you will always be the sun to my moon.
Please forgive me for falling in love with Jonathan. Believe me, I fought that hard. I never regretted it but felt guilty that I was happy with him when you were suffering under the hands of his mother. That's unfair to you; you have every reason to hate me and him. I see so much of Lucifer in you both. I hope you guys get along one day because I love you both, as both of you are a part of me. To hate him is to hate a part of me because he is my soulmate, as our souls are joined as one, literally.
This is not only a love and apology letter but also a business one. You might hate me for saving you when you wanted to die, but I could never let you die. I love you too damn much for that, and you have a purpose at Camp Genesis. I deemed Chaim in charge of Camp Genesis but gave him the option of a dual leadership with you if I succeeded in healing you. If you are healthy, fight for our people. You are the son of a light bringer and have the potential to do great things. Work on the power you have, and make it stronger. You are part of the key to defeating the darkness that's coming.
After Jonathan and I became one, my visions got stronger. The things I saw will haunt me until the day I die, if I'm not dead already. You may hate Jonathan, but you will all have to work together to defeat Satan if I don't make it back. You two are more powerful than you know and will conquer many things if you work together.
You being alive and safe makes me happy. I'm crying happy tears for you, Eli. I love you and miss you more than you know. I know you think the women who love you get hurt, but don't let that ever stop you from loving another because your love is worth it. Even when my soul is with another, don't ever stop fighting for us. It's a promise you made that I hope you'll keep. We're better off together than we are apart.
From: The first girl you fell in love with who has the twin to your grace.
P.S. Your pajama bottoms are mine. I will never part with those, even after death. I promise if you take them, I will haunt you from the afterlife or come back and steal them.
"I could never hate you because I'm still in love with you," I murmur as I fold her letter back in the envelope.
"Well, that's a problem," Lila appears from out of nowhere.
"I've been back for less than twenty-four hours, and you're already spying on me? Traitor," I spit out while glaring at her.
"I love you, and I am your friend when I tell you that being in love with Hannah while she's in love with Jonathan will not end well for you. I almost died because I chose to stick up for Hannah. I was rooting for you two, but in the end, she chose him. They're mated, and their souls are together or some shit. That's not shit you mess with, Eli."
"While most of that may be true, you're wrong about one thing. In the end, she chose me," I regretfully reply as tears stream down my face.
Lila wraps her arms around me as I cry unashamedly into her shoulder. "I miss her too, but in order to honor her wishes, we have to be the best versions of ourselves. I wouldn't be here right now if it wasn't for her love and forgiveness. We owe it to her to make things right here, so if she comes back, she'll be proud of all we've done."
"God, did you get ten years older while I was gone?" I chuckle through my tears.
Lila kisses my cheek. "Yeah, a lot has happened, but it's okay because you'll play catch up like Hannah did. Show her the man you can be instead of the boy who's still in love with her."
I sigh, "That's probably the smartest thing you've ever said."
