The Babysitter

Part 24

It took me a few seconds, or maybe minutes to set my feet on the ground.

When I was fully on the ground Sarai stood next to me and held my hand while we silently walked to the restroom...

I brushed my teeth, with one hand while Sarai held the other... She can be clingy, like her mother maybe... It's something that I learned with time from both parts.

With Sarai, especially with the last unfortunate events of the past week, she has been grabbing my attention more than ever... but that could be just because she witnessed everything and deep down is scared that the same thing could happen again...

When I was done brushing my teeth I used one hand to wash my face...

When I looked towards Sarai she was still looking at me... with a big smile.

I returned the same gesture.

Sarai; MonMon?

She called me when I was drying my face...

Mon; Yes, sweetheart?!

Sarai; I love you!

It caught me off guard.

I had never doubted her love for me but this was the first time I think she has ever said that out loud, using those three beautiful words.

Tears started streaming down my face, like a river.

I let go of her hand and picked her small body up, placing her on the bathroom counter; looking in her beautiful and loving eyes. I caressed her cheeks while crying...

Mon; You are the best thing that has happened to me in a while Sarai.

She smiles, I know she understands the meaning behind my words. She's smart!

Sarai; Don't ever leave me, please!

Gosh, I was now sobbing.

I hugged her immediately.

I hope I would've never had to leave her. I don't think I would be able to handle it either!
The connection I have with this little human is unbelievable and unexplained.

Maybe, it's because I was left with this huge hole in my heart after letting my most precious gift slip off my fingers.

I don't think even if I had another child of my own would be able to cover the whole Belle left in my heart because no one can replace my Belle.

But why with Sarai it doesn't feel like I'm replacing her...

Why does it feel right?!

I feel guilty for saying it, but it's just something I don't know how to explain and I'm sure people will call me crazy to even think that but that's what I'm feeling.

It's crazy because Sarai is not even mine. I'm just her babysitter and her mother's girlfriend.

And life happens. Anything can happen - but I hope whatever happens does not mean I have to leave her behind... or distance myself from her because it would hurt me. We would all get hurt, badly!

Mon; I will try my best, my very best to never leave you, sweetheart!

I was still sobbing ... so I hugged her tightly!

I never wan to let go.

Sam; Could I too join this beautiful moment?

I opened my eyes and in the mirror, I could see Sam's reflection. She was smiling.

Sarai; Come mama, make it a sandwich hug.

Sarai opened her arms and Sam joined the hug, with me in the middle.