Welfare and Warfare

Chapter 11

They held a farewell party for Dex, allowing everyone to talk to him and wish him well with his soon-to-be freedom. There were some tears, though out of happiness for Dex, smothering him in affection and desperate hugs for the possible last time.

The last time...

Kai did not know how long he had left for his sentence. How old will Dex be when he is released, too? Perhaps Dex won't be around. Or Kai could potentially lose all of his memories like Sumit and Oscar, so he won't remember Dex and-

On the other side of the party, Dex was giving a heartfelt speech, the cheers and joking heckles snapping Kai out of his musings. He couldn't focus on the words, Dex's thoughts and feelings, his farewells, something about how he'll miss people, and then he talked about his son and how he will reunite with him again after so many years.

This is a happy moment. So remember to smile, Kai.

He struggled to eat any of the food. Oscar had prepared the buffet, making the silver food packets and Abyss fruit look as appetising as possible, though it was just their ordinary meals shaped in a more gourmet presentation.

He struggled to drink any of the drinks, which was just water with a bit of flavouring from the leaves of the Abyss fruit, somewhat resembling tea.

And he struggled to talk. To anyone. Kai. Could not hold a conversation. People spoke at him, and he forced a smile, nodding and occasionally managing to reply with limited substance to the discussion. But mostly, he kept his distance, being present even if his mind wasn't.

The party slowly subsided as it grew later, the sky turning dark, and only the lamp posts illuminated the place. Kai helped Oscar and a few others pack away any empty dishes and food scraps to be reused for tomorrow, though Kai's motives were perhaps not so selfless and generous. No, he was trying to avoid Dex. Since yesterday, when that light shone on the back of his neck and the announcement that he was free, Kai tried to stay with Dex as much as he could, but it was just painful. With every moment around him, it was like Kai would break down, to spurt out how he felt, those selfish thoughts, wanting Dex to stay but had to go. He finally was free. He could finally see his son. And that meant that they could no longer be together. And that was okay.

This was a happy moment.

It felt counterintuitive to avoid him. Kai wanted them both to stay together as they had been for almost a decade. He had known that one day this would all end, that either one would be released before the other, or one would get badly injured and lose their memories. But he had hoped that somehow, conveniently, with such a low chance of possibility, they would be released together simultaneously, along with Klei and Wendy, with Rin and Corinna and everyone else. Their entire found family, the community that they made, would somehow leave together. Always together no matter where they were.

But finally, the reality had sunk in. That wasn't going to happen. Ever.

It took Kai some time to come to terms with leaving Klei and Wendy when their group split up due to a moral argument and when Calanthe decided to leave the Abyss. How long would it take him to be accustomed to Dex being gone? How long before Dex forgets everything and everyone in the Abyss when he returns to his new life?

However, Kai could not avoid Dex all night. Dex approached him after everything had been packed, and everyone returned to their homes to sleep or, if they were guards, to take the night watch.

"Hey," Dex said softly, his hands clasping together as if he didn't know what to do with them.

"Sup," Kai said with an attempt at non-chalantness. "Had fun tonight?"