My Forever and Always (The Phantom of The Opera)

Chapter 46 - Like a Dream

I just shake my head and walk over to the door to lock it.

"Az, clearly, we need to talk." I sigh and look into his eyes, I felt terrible and guilty.

"Do we really have anything to talk about? In a situation where our whole existence and chances of going back home are hanging by one damn object with no clear scientific explanation, you choose to hide things from me? Weren't we supposed to have each other's back for the rest of our lives? The ride or die buddies? And now you choose to lie to me when it matters the most?" Aziel's voice was etched with a sharp tone of pain, which clawed at my heart.

"I'm sorry, it's just that everything happened so fast, I did not know how to approach this topic."

"Well, you've missed your train Clary. Get me out of here, then we'll continue this little apology chat." Aziel said in a stiff tone.

Clarissa: Look, for starters, Erik gave this pendant to me himself, he is not the villain you think he is.

Aziel: Well, save me his character analogy for when I care. Right now, I don't feel like discussing a murderous narcissist's redeeming qualities. Just get me out of here, that's the only thing I'm asking of you.

Clarissa: And I promise I will get you home Az. Nothing has changed, and you mean the world to me. You should know that.

Aziel: I didn't exactly feel like a priority when I discovered that you hid such an important thing from me. Here's the big question Clary, do YOU want to go home?

Clarissa: I-I do! Of course, I do! Everyone I love, my whole life, my family, career and my very existence is linked to my home. I will go back.

Aziel: And Erik for very obvious reasons doesn't fit into our equation. Cut him off before you get too involved.

Clarissa: I'm afraid I can not do that either. If it was possible, I wouldn't be pulled back to this place 10 years after leaving. Which is why I said we need to talk.

Aziel: I am still very angry but ok, I'll give you once chance Clary. We need some wine and food.

Clarissa: Indeed, we do.

And so, I poured out my heart to Aziel. Everything since the party, every single detail, sparing none. What happened 10 years ago and everything that happened since we came and everything that changed in the span of past few days.

Aziel: You love him a lot, don't you?

Clarissa: I know it would save everyone a lot of trouble if I didn't but despite the whole damn universe being against our chances of being together, I actually do love him, very much. I have no control over it.

Aziel: I would be lying if I say I am not jealous but at the same time I pity you. Such strong, raw and pure emotions. You are lucky enough to even experience a love that deep in your lifetime but...

Clarissa: I know, the odds are stacked heavily against me. As cliché as this may sound, but I feel like Erik and me, we are those destined for each other, star-crossed lovers. I always felt that these things are exaggerated in fiction but now look at me.

Aziel: I'm not doubting your feelings here but, What do we do now?

Clarissa: Build a new strategy.

Aziel: The goal of which is?

Clarissa: To go home.

Aziel's eyes widen in response, but it soon turns to an expression of understanding and grief. He reaches his arms to me, engulfing me in a hug.

Clarissa: What can I do? I have to go home to my family at all costs. You need to be home. I can't steal your life from you.

Before realising it, warm tears blurred my vision. I never had a choice in this to begin with, no matter how much I pretend to have. Christine's diary, the day I checked it after dropped me in my room, has went back to its original state. The following pages still have the same story, the same villain. I have control over nothing.