Taken

[31] Love And Letting Go

"Hey, how are you feeling?" I prop my head up with one hand and he glances at the ceiling.

"I feel like I got shot. You?" He brushes hair out of my face with his right hand and I smile.

"I feel better now that you're awake and talking. You know you didn't have to risk taking me to the hospital, right?" I frown a bit and he smirks.

"Yes I know, but I didn't care as long as you were okay." He frowns, probably confused by how sweet the words he just said.

"Justine, I don't really know what to say to you. I'm not use to these feelings that I feel and I don't I don't know what to say what I feel for you. I don't know why the fuck this is so difficult." He smacks his hand over his face and I giggle.

"It's okay, I'm having the same problem. You've always intimidated me, so it's hard for me to say it too. Even though it was easier when you were unconscious." I smile softly and he drops his hand looking at me.

"You've said it before though. You told me you liked me before, remember? And I was an asshole to you." He frowns and I shrug.

"Yeah, but I lived." I smile and he rolls his eyes.

"Justine, you always try to find the brighter side to things. You're so.. ugh. This is really difficult..." He trails off and I laugh.

"Oh come on, it's not hard..."I roll my eyes playfully and he smirks.

"Alright, then you go first." He smiles softly and it's weird  to see it on his face, but I like it.

"Okay, I will. I lo-" He cuts me off yelling loudly.

"NO STOP! I change my mind, I want to say it first." I laugh at his eagerness and I nod.

"Well, go on. Here , if this helps, close your eyes and just pretend like you're talking to yourself." I smile and he narrows his eyes at me.

"What? Justine, that's-" I put a finger to his lips and he widens his eyes.

"Don't think about it, just do it." I nod slowly and he groans, but closes his eyes.

"Okay.. so I know I gave you away, which I really regret, but it was only because of my feelings that I unintentionally developed for you. I gave you away hoping those feelings would leave, cause for some reason, everyone I love seems to get hurt. My mom... my mom was killed right in front of me by Guy, who I found out is my dad unfortunately, but he killed her and took away the only person I ever loved. Then I took you and you were so innocent and pure. I couldn't even hurt you. Yeah I grabbed on you a couple of times and shook you up a bit, but me actually thinking of slapping you made me feel like shit for even thinking it. I've hit on the others, don't judge me, but you were different. I would see you lingering around the guys and it's like everyone fell into line because of you, you just got thrown in here and starting changing things. I didn't like it at first; the feelings that I had towards you. The feelings I had when seeing Isaiah finger raping you, the feelings that I had seeing you attach to Stoke, the feelings that I had when we-" He opens his eyes and my breath gets caught in my throat. The way he looks at me I can already tell that he's being completely truthful.

"... when we... made love. Honestly, that was the gentlest I've ever been with a girl in bed. I just didn't want to hurt you in any way. All those times I was cold was because I was scared of the feelings I had for you. I knew if I started feeling that way, something bad was gonna happen... but I know I started all of this because of that. So, I'm trying to say that I'm done beating around the bush with you. I love you and I know it's gonna take sometime trying to be lovey covey and gentle with you, but I'm willing to try for you." He smiles softly and I can't help the huge grin on my face.