Timeless - Mal Pugh (Third book to Attached and My Cure)

Chapter 9

Morgana's POV

Alyssa Naeher and I were on our way back to Chicago as soon as we could the next morning. We found a late afternoon flight. 

I spent the rest of the time I had in St. Louis that day with Chloe and Hayley. Then Naeher and I tagged along with the Spirit girls and we all waited together at the airport since we were the only ones left the following day. 

I almost dreaded going back to Chicago, but I missed Mal so much that even seeing her pissed off would make me happy. 

I almost burst into tears when we had to split up. The next time we'd all be seeing each other is probably after we've been selected for the World Cup. Maybe there will be a weird minute where its possible to travel, but who knows. 

I did my fair share of teasing Trinity while we wandered the airport, as well as hearing Sanchito say dumb things. 

I clung to Hatchy for a long time. I knew I'd struggle without her, because something tells me I'm going to have a tougher time with Mal then I thought. 

When I let go, we all went to our respective gates and Alyssa and I waited there for about an hour before boarding. 

"What's the scowl for?" She asked me, laughing slightly. 

"Nothing." I shook my head. 

"Tell me, Morgana. That was a pretty nasty look." 

"It's just Thompson. She's starting to piss me off. She won't leave me alone." 

"She just likes you." 

"A little too much." 

"Just be nice to her. She's young and she's got nobody. She's just looking for a friend." 

"Why me?" I sighed, pulling my hood over my eyes. 

"You're someone to look up to." 

"She's 18 and I'm 20, how much looking up is there?" 

"Just be nice, please." 

"Fine." 

As soon as I turned my phone back on, they started boarding first class, which was us. I was happy to leave Thompson on read and put my phone on airplane mode for a little while. 

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After I was dropped off at my house, I was afraid to go inside. I contemplated telling Mal's parents that my flight was delayed and I was spending another night in St. Louis and just go to one of my teammate's houses, but I knew that wouldn't go over well.

I took out my key and unlocked the door, walking in slowly in case any of them were in the living room. 

All of them were. They were all waiting for me, including Mal herself. 

I ignored everything that's happened and gave Mal a kiss after hugging both of her parents. 

I didn't know if she was putting on a front for her parents or not, but I hoped she wasn't. I was ready for this fight to be over, even more so after seeing her, 

They talked about how well I did at the game and stuff. We talked about Chloe and Hayley and how Chloe's going to have the baby any day at this point, and Hayley's getting so big and how she made a bracelet for her Aunt Mal. I gave her one of the red white and blue ones, and for the first time in days, I saw that smile, the one I was so desperate to see. 

We all talked for a little bit longer, then we moved Mal back into our room carefully, and then we got some alone time. 

"So you had a good time?" She asked, the silence that had fallen between us very awkward. 

"No, not really." I sighed, finding something to change into. "It sucked."

"But you got to see Hayley, was that not fun?" 

"Well-" 

"At least you weren't stuck here in your fucking bed."

"That wasn't-" 

"You're taking everything for granted. You-" 

"Mal!" 

"What??" 

"Why are you so pissed at me suddenly? What's your problem? I know we had a fight and I'm sorry. But you keep doing this. I love you and I just want to talk to you! I don't think you're really understanding anything. It was, what, two days without you and it was hell, Mal. I spent the last two days on the verge of tears constantly because I knew I messed up, and I missed you. I wanted to talk to you, check up on you..." My voice broke then. I couldn't hold it in anymore. "But you just completely did...whatever you did. I don't know if you need to hear me say that I'm an asshole. Do I need to say I'm an awful person? I'm sorry. I'm just so fucking sorry. I want to help you and be there for you but I CAN'T if you keep treating me like this." 

She was silent. 

So was I. 

What happened? 

Both of us bit back tears, and because she was stuck in her room, I got up. 

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." I said, taking one last look at her before walking out the door and into the backyard. 

If I feel this scared, I can't even imagine how she's feeling. 

I know I needed to apologize, but there was no going back in there after that.

I needed something right now. I need something that's not Mal. Anything. 

Should I go home to Colorado? Should I just stay and try to work it out? I have no idea. I couldn't make a rational decision through my anger. I'm mad at Mal, I'm mad at the world, and I'm especially mad at myself. 

I've never had such an overwhelming rush of emotions. I had no idea how to handle it. In a blur that lasted no more than 30 seconds, I kicked the fence, punched a tree and broke down crying. 

My rash decisions didn't stop when I calmed down a little bit. I lucked out that my next decision didn't come back to haunt me, because it could have been pretty bad.