"None taken," I chuckled. My expression then softened again once I looked into her caring eyes again, and laid a hand on her cheek. "Baby, why didn't you tell me?... I mean I don't want to be upset, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't make me feel some kind of way."
"No, you have every right to be upset with me, Lauren- I'm really sorry that I didn't tell you," she took my hand from her cheek to place two kisses on my palm. "You came first to me... I knew that he was taking a toll on you, even from states away, and I couldn't stand the sight of that. Knowing that he hurt you, and was living to see the light of day let alone walking around with his head held high about it, boiled my blood. And I didn't want you to know because I didn't want to remind you of him or what he put you through, whatsoever. What I was doing with Troy, I was doing on my own because I thought I was protecting you in a way-"
"Why do you always do that?" I chuckled while dropping my head a bit. "I can decide that for myself, you know?"
"I know," she said genuinely, knowing that I was being serious despite me laughing. "And I'm sorry- I know how much you hate feeling patronized, but I just want what's best for you- and to see you happy."
"It's not always up to you to decide though, Sade," I looked to my right at her, finding her attention now focused on the floor as she'd started playing with her fingers. "I absolutely love and adore how much and how deeply you care, but I still want to know. Even if it does hurt me, or you end up being right like always-" she chuckled softly once I nudged her shoulder. "I still want you to tell me, okay?"
Just as she did to me, I grabbed a gentle hold of her chin, urging her eyes to meet mine.
"Okay," Sade muttered, and my brows knit at the tenderness of her tone. "I'm sorry..."
"Emerald, baby, it's okayy," I stood her up then pulled her hips down into my lap, making her turn into me. "Don't get all sad on me now, I'm supposed to be the sad one." She smiled softly at my words, which was my goal, and I smiled back.
"You know I hate it when you're upset with me," she said as I kissed from her shoulder to her ear.
"I wasn't really mad at you baby, I promise. Just that I felt a little left in the dark is all, but I understand now- it's okay."
"Are you sure?"
"I'm positive," I slid my hand up along her neck to cup her cheek and lean in. "Give me a kiss-" I hummed softly as she did so. "Mm, one more-" Sade smiled into it and kissed me a bit longer this time.
As my hand slid from her cheek and made a line down her chest and abdomen to wrap around her waist, with granted access, my tongue slipped into her mouth.
Seconds later, she'd pushed me on my back.
"Uh uh, come here," I said, making Sade giggle once I'd swiftly switched our positions.
Now with her under me, her legs wrapped around my torso as our lips smacked.
~~~~~~~~~
Far too long has it been since I've been in the spotlight.
I'd forgotten the adrenaline that rushes through you at that sound of a massive crowd. I'd forgotten what it feels like to have dozens of eyes and cameras on you, critiquing your every move. And I'd forgotten how it feels to be on the go so frequently. Spending eight months cooped up in the house has definitely done a number on me, but I'm excited to get back into it.
After flying back home from the wedding, we had about two days of calm before the storm began.
As of now, the Oscars are right around the corner, and it's honestly made both Sade and I's lives pretty hectic recently. This past week, and the week before, Sade and I have barely seen each other. I've missed her like hell, but at least work has been keeping me busy enough from losing my shit.
Chapter 81
Start from the beginning
