The Bodyguard // Lee Heeseung

fourteen

heeseung and i leave General taehyung's office and we both start heading back to my private suite. 

"hey, i just wanted to say thank you for what you did back there," heeseung said scratching the back of his neck. 

"there's no need to thank me for being honest," i say, keeping my eyes ahead. "and i meant every word i said."

we continue to make our way to my private suite. when we get there, i see ni-ki standing guard outside of my room looking worried.

"oh my god seoyeon!" he says running up to us and giving me a big bear hug. from the corner of my eye i see heeseung's face change.

he looks....sad??

"seoyeon where were you?! i was worried sick!" ni-ki says. "i thought u were in your room resting but you ran off!"

ni-ki turns his head to see heeseung awkwardly standing there.

"thank god you found heeseung hyung, at least that way i know you're in good hands."

"y-yeah, thanks ni-ki" i mumble. i turn back around to see heeseung still awkwardly standing a few feet away from me.

"heeseung, i was wondering if i could have a word with you in my suite," i say clearing my throat.

this request obviously took both heeseung and ni-ki by surprise as their eyes went big. 

"well then, i'm going to make sure the final preparations for the ball have been finished," ni-ki says as he slowly backs away from us and runs around the corner out of sight. 

.

.

.

this was the first time anyone other than ni-ki, the maids or father have been in my room. 

"wow, nice place," heeseung says with a chuckle.

"hopefully the training barracks are ok," i say suddenly concerned with the notion that heeseung finds his living space confining.

"no not at all!" heeseung says getting defensive. "it was a bit tight at first but now that so many trainees have been eliminated, it feels a bit too empty."

"well of course, there were 40 of you, now there's only 15."

i plop down on my bed and rearrange my nightstand while heeseung walks over to the balcony doors. 

"so....what did you want to chat about your Majesty?"

"oh please, just call me seoyeon," i say. "there's no one here, so drop the honorifics."

"but it feels inappropriate," heeseung retaliates, "it's just that, i'm nobody to you so keeping it formal seems like the most comfortable thing for both you and me."

"what did you say?"

i slowly get up and make my way over to where heeseung was standing. 

"a nobody?"

i was so shocked that heeseung could even say such a thing. does he even know what kind of magical effect he has on me?!

"heeseung, why would you say that?"

"i told you before seoyeon, i lost both my parents at a young age and practically fought for my life until i ended up training at the palace. then i had to work my ass off to be seen just to get recruited into the elite trainee program to even have a shot of working as a member of the royal guard. i just wanted to find my place in the world, i wanted to be something remarkable. but after meeting you and meeting so many other talented trainees and soldiers, i see that there's nothing remarkable or special about me at all. i'm just another one of your soldiers. nothing special at all."

"you on the other hand are just....amazing beyond words. not only are you powerful because you have supernatural abilities, but you're an inspiration to people. you stand up in what you believe in and aren't afraid to voice your opinions. you're a good listener and always do what's good for the kingdom and it's people. i realized that i will never be enough compared to you, and that you truly are the remarkable one in this whole thing."

i didn't realize the tears falling from my eyes until heeseung finished his confession. no one had ever said such kind and genuine things to me, and i never knew that he felt like this, and it breaks me to see him so hard on himself. 

the fact that he thinks he's not worthy of anything, especially love and success.

"heeseung. look at me." 

i take my finger and position his head so that he's looking directly at me.

"you are more than enough and are more than remarkable. you have no idea what kind of effect you have on other people. you inspire them to be better, to work harder, and to stay true to themselves. christ, you've had an effect on me!"

i take my hands and cup his cheeks, tears still running down my face as i try to maintain eye contact.

"you are so special, more than you know. if anyone deserves a place in the royal guard, it's you. if anyone deserves any amount of success, it's you. if anyone deserves to be loved like the world was going to end tomorrow, it's you."

i watch as tears form in his eyes, and for the first time, i think i see the real heeseung. the vulnerable boy that had nothing and no love until he became a part of a greater cause. 

and no matter how messed up his past was, the heeseung standing in front of me is nothing short of perfect and genuine.

"heeseung, i'm here for you, no matter what."

heeseung takes my hands from the side of his face and lowers them to wrap around his waist. he takes his left hand and tucks some of the loose strands of hair back behind my ear before his hand makes contact with the back of my head and connects his lips to mine. 

it was a short, very soft kiss, but the feeling of warmth that ran through my body was nothing that i've ever experienced before. 

it was everything a first kiss could ever be.

and the fact that it was heeseung made it that much better.