Perspectives

Chapter Twenty-three

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

"What are you doing, man? Chill!" Sarah's high-pitched tone rang out like a shrill alarm. She watched her brother roughly stuff clothes in a bag in panic.

"Can you calm down?" Shiloh hissed, her wailing was making him lose concentration and he wanted to make sure he had his essential items before he left.

"You're the one that needs to calm down!" Sarah huffed and tried to drag the bag away from him so he would stop packing. She jumped slightly as her brother yanked the bag back into his possession and continued, it finally dawned on her that he was serious about leaving the house. She looked around the room hopelessly and regretfully caught her mother's eye who stood in the doorway of his room with her hands crossed over her chest indignantly. "Are you not going to stop him?"

"If Tayo wants to leave then let him leave!" Shiloh's mother often interchanged between her children's English and Yoruba names, naturally. Although she was born in England, she spent most of her childhood going back and forth between countries and fully embraced her culture. "Your brother does not like how I operate in this house so maybe this is not the right place for him to be!"

Shiloh bit down on his lip to prevent him from responding to her. He decided not to engage in any more conversation because his attempts to reason with her were always futile. Instead, he turned to his sister who he loved with all his heart and regretted that she was caught up in the chaos. "I can't lie, Sarah. I am not doing this anymore, I physically can't."

"But you can't leave me?"

"I'm not leaving you." he hissed and tore his gaze away from her tear brimmed eyes.

"Then unpack your bag and talk to me properly!" Sarah dragged the bag away from him once again, her knotless braids swinging around her from all the sudden movements.

"Stop doing that, seriously." He retrieved the bag back from her once again and stood up to put his feet in the first pair of trainers that caught his attention.

"Mum, are you seriously not going to say anything?"

Eniola recoiled at the sound of her daughter's voice. She was used to Shiloh's defiance but had never heard such a lack of respect in her daughter's tone before. "Doyin, don't raise your voice at me."

"He's about to leave the house! Your son is leaving because he can't take this anymore! Are you understanding that or are you that concerned about me raising my voice?"

Eni rolled her eyes and pulled her robe closer to her body. "Do you think I'm going to stress over this? I'm going to sleep and don't wake me up when you're leaving."

Sarah watched her mother walk away and retreat to her room, feigning indifference but Sarah knew her heart was torn that her relationship with Shiloh had reached such a pitfall.

"Sarah, stop." Shiloh rested his hands on her shoulders and rubbed them to provide her some comfort. "You're acting like I'm a little boy. I'm a big man, okay? I'm twenty-four, I can handle myself and I'm mature enough to know that the best thing for me to do is to remove myself from this situation. It might not be forever, but it is what it is for now. You know I've always got you, Sarah. It's me and you till the death of me, but I can't do this anymore."

Shiloh felt his sister's shoulders sink under his touch as she began to cry uncontrollably. Multiple tears flew out of her eyes rapidly as if she had been holding them in and finally broke down. She watched their household deteriorate in front of her eyes and felt like there was nothing she could do about it. Sarah loved her mother and her brother equally and hated to see them at odds. When she lost her stepfather, she thought she could never be whole again. She felt like everything she loved and valued had been snatched from her and that life all together was slipping out of her grasp. They were very strong emotions for a child to feel, but she sourly learnt that trauma does not have an age limit.