Oppsosites Attracts BUT Similarities Bind Together

Chapter 35

Sara started to read the diary from where she left.

Dear Diary,

Its been 2 weeks since i came back to home. I pursued my dream career. Now spending my life with my parents just like how i wanted, adding to it got an amazing wife, 'my Ammu'.

Yes i call her Ammu, i dont know why exactly i wanted to call her like that but i love calling her Ammu.

Initially i thought, she is ignorant towards me. Her lack of response hurted me so much, i wanted her to admire me and my appearance bt she didnt, she doesnt even respond to my intimate touch, nvr once i felt this much insulted in my life, inferiority complex kicked in and i went rough on her.

All my life, i was the centre of attraction everywhere from family to school/college.

My parents, paati adored and celebrated me soo much, i wanted my wife to be the same but Sara doesnt treated me any special.

I got attention of girls wherever i go, but she cared least to look at my way. Girls used to throw themselves over me. They used to shout my name in pleasure in bed, but she doesnt even moan. I went wild on her to gain it but no she doesnt bulge.

By passing days, i started to read her expressions and understood she doesnt express things in words.

Instead her eyes speaks, the most attractive pair of eyes i have seen ever. God! with that doe shaped eyes she eats me alive. Seeing lust for me in those eyes makes me feel giddy every single time.

In bed, she frown when it pains, when she slightly parts her mouth that indicates she is experiencing the pleasure. Now i dont have her, instead serve her with what she wants. And i m totally loving it. I would love to be her servant all my life in bed.

And one more thing, i thought her to be deer, but my wife proved me that she is lioness. Damn! She is so feisty and equally wild as me. She almost tore my lips yesterday by dominating the kiss.

Ahh.. how did i forget this best part "Kiss". I was never a fan of the idea of lip lock kiss or kiss in general. But with her its upside down. She is the first women i kiss, will be the only one.

Her lips are like a drug, has the capacity to take my sanity. I can survive having only her lips. I just want to kiss her all time. I m addicted to her lips and kiss will be an understatement.

I never once thought that holding hands will feel so intimate and cuddling would be this cozy,she messed up my system but in a good way.

Apart from our physical relationship, she is very good girl. She takes care of my parents, family, household works without any ego despite being financially independent.

I guess marriage is not that bad thing as i thought it to be. Having Sara as my wife with my parents being my side, I feel so happy and content with my life. I think this is the best phase of my life.

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Hey diary,

May be coz i told you that this is the best phase of my life. God changed his plan i think.

Last night I got to know that, I will become a father soon, yes my child is growing inside Sara.

I was soo happy when Ammu told me, but my happiness disappeared in thin air with what she said next.

She confessed her love. When she said "I love you" my heart became heavy filled with pure guilt. The guilt of misguiding her into something which i cant reciprocate.

I dont know what i m going to do.

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Hi diary,

Long time,my life is very busy. Well i made it busy, coz i couldnt face Sara.
I changed my entire career plan. I started the clinic and working side by side coz now i got more responsibility. I want to fulfill the need of my child and wife without any one's help.

Its very tiring to work for more than 12 hrs, but i have no other way. There are two reason for me working long,  one is to escape from Sara and another is, I have to make myself tied so that i can sleep at night, natural sleep was long gone the day, i m so used to cuddle her that i couldnt sleep in the absence of her warmth.

I soo much wanted to spend time with sara and baby, but i couldnt face her. Whenever she smile at me, my heart ache, guilt eats me alive.

Only solace i get is, I could kiss my baby daily before i sleep. Having her infront of me is my only happiness.

.

I wish i could throw you somewhere and never reach out to you, for the choas you created in my life.

And again, the reality that i have none other than you to share myself brought me back to you.

She went, my ammu went along with our baby leaving me all alone. The betrayal look she gave me stabbed by heart.

My guilty is killing me like a slow poison.

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Hi Diary,

You know what i m very happy today. I became a father, my prince made a grand entry in the world 3 days ago. One more important thing "I m in love with my Ammu"

Its shocking right, for me too.

I never once imagined i will fall in love in my life. But i did very hardly, without my knowledge.

The arrival of my son made me to realise what my brain fail to understand.

In the hospital when Sara screamed,  i felt like my soul left my body. I was scared to death hearing her scream, never once in my life my hands trembled when handling patients but i shivered just by thinking her undergoing knife.

I knew i care for her, but this is different. I was fooling myself all this while, by considering my feelings for Sara as lust and attraction. Today my heart squeezed painfully to let me know that this organ pump for her. I breath and live only to love her madly.

Its time to make everything right and to save my love and life. First i want to gain her forgiveness then i will win her heart.

I heard, people will give up their favourite thing as a part of prayer till their wish come true.

Here i m giving upon you. I will come to you after winning the heart of my Ammu. I hope i will come back soon

Until then bye..