His challenge #3

Chapter 1: Stranger in Portland

And we hate ourselves even more when we lie to those we love.

I know I do.

I hate every single thing I do. From the time I wake up to the point, I go to sleep.

And there's nothing anyone can do.

So when I looked my brother in the eyes, when I was at the darkest place, at the bottom of the well, pit whatever you like to call it, I told him I was leaving.

Said to him that I need help and that I'm going to get it, just not with him in New York, not with any of my siblings.

Another lie.

But I couldn't look at them anymore and see the way they looked at me. It was ruining me.

I need space where I can lock myself up and no one can get in, not even my own thoughts.

Go somewhere where no one knows me. Where I can be just another stranger walking down the street.

Portland.

A place where I've never been.

A city that I picked with a coin. I tossed it over a map and it fell on it. The next thing I did was packed.

I said goodbye to my siblings and left New York for Portland.

Stopped for a night on my way but I didn't sleep anyway. I just stared at the ceiling and thought about things I shouldn't be.

And then I was here. In Portland, driving to my new place, my oldest brother on the phone making sure I got here safely.

"I really hope you got yourself something comfortable. If there's any problem with the money..."

"What you sent is enough." I cut him off.

Killian sent a few thousand to my account, saying that I should get a place to live and everything around it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I won't be sleeping under a bridge, but I can't help thinking that I can't do anything on my own again and have to rely on others.

"If you need anything, please call, Finn." I could hear in his voice that he was worried about me.

"Of course." A lie. "I have to go, I'm almost there."

"Take care and call me."

"Yeah, yeah. Bye, Killian." I let him say his goodbyes before taking my eyes off the road for a moment to hang up and put my phone down.

I looked up from the dashboard and immediately hit the brakes when a woman appeared a few meters in front of me.

I barely managed to brake, the belt cutting into my chest.

"Shit!" I screamed and started throwing my hands at the woman who was looking at me confused.

I honked, which made her jump slightly. She shook her head and continued across the road.

Unbelievable.

*****

I parked the car in front of the building where my apartment was supposed to be and took two travel bags out of the trunk.

I went up the stairs to the top floor and found apartment number 16.

I unlocked it and went inside.

I dropped my bags on the ground next to my feet and closed the door behind me.

I took a deep breath and looked around.

To the right was a couch with a table and a television. Behind the TV was a smaller wall behind which I could see the edge of the bed.