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AFTER GETTING RID OF ALL OF HER THOUGHTS,
Y/N took a long and relaxing shower, allowing the water to wash away the remnants of her stress and frustration. She chose a soft, comfortable outfit to wear, wanting to envelop herself in a sense of ease. As she stepped out of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around her hair, she found Sae sitting on the bed, engrossed in his phone. She walked over to the mirror and plugged in the hairdryer, feeling the warm air caress her as she dried her hair, each stroke with her fingers soothing her mind.
Sae glanced up from his phone, his eyes lingering on Y/N as she stood by the mirror. There was a sense of calmness and contentment that radiated from her, a stark contrast to the flustered state she had been in just moments ago. In a moment of impulsiveness, he raised his phone and attempted to capture the moment, zooming in on her face.
"You know, it's illegal to take pictures of someone without their permission" Y/N's voice resonated through the room as she turned towards him.
"Ah- No I wasn't, I don't want to ruin my phone with your pictures," he said while lowering his phone slowly. "By the way..." he started trying to change the topic, "Your volleyball skills... They didn't just look like you played for the first time. You have experience."
Y/N smirked playfully at Sae's remark. "Well, I might have played a few games here and there," she admitted, tossing her now-dry hair over her shoulder. "I used to play in high school. It's been a while, though."
"So like were you in the team or did you just play for fun?" Sae inquired, genuinely interested in learning more about her volleyball background.
As Y/N sat down on a chair, she took a moment to reflect on Sae's question. Her mind briefly wandered back to her experiences, the mixed emotions associated with the sport she once dedicated herself to. "Fun? Huh... Volleyball isn't fun," she said, her tone tinged with a touch of bitterness.
Sae raised an eyebrow in surprise, "Isn't fun? But you were clearly enjoying the game back there." he pointed out.
"Hmm yeah, it was a fun match and I really enjoyed it but if I think about volleyball as a whole, then it sucks. I hate it to the core."
Sae looked taken aback by Y/N's strong statement. He had seen her passion and skill on the beach, and it seemed contradictory to hear her express such a strong dislike for the sport. Curiosity sparked in his eyes as he leaned in closer, wanting to understand her perspective.
"Why do you hate volleyball so much?" Sae asked, his voice laced with genuine curiosity.
Leaning back in the chair, Y/N let out a weary sigh, her gaze focusing on a distant point. "There are better players than me, so I have no spot. What could I possibly contribute when there will always be someone who can outshine me? I've been playing volleyball since I was a kid and dreamt of playing it professionally too, that is until... the national tournament."
Y/N's voice trailed off, her eyes distant as she recalled the memories that still haunted her. Sae remained silent, giving her the space to gather her thoughts and share her story.
"I spent day and night in the school gym, practising and honing my skills. I was pretty confident too. Everyone believed in me—my team, my coach, my family, my school—that I would lead the team to the nationals and win the tournament."
"So you lost?" Sae completed her story in three words. "and quit?"
She was a little taken aback because of his blunt words but still managed to give him a hesitant nod.
"That's fucking stupid"
"What?" She asked with a frown.
"You lost against someone better than you so you thought that there's no need for you and that you can quit."
"I didn't quit just because of that... We lost in the finals by one point and that was a big mess up on my part. I missed a big opportunity to be scouted. It was a big match you know..."
"You didn't get the offer?"
"I got one but I denied it because I didn't know if I wanted to even continue playing or not. The ace of the other team had all the attention on her and what made it worse was that I knew her from middle school. She wasn't even interested in the sport, to begin with. I BROUGHT HER INTO IT! I GAVE RISE TO MY OWN DEMISE AS A VOLLEYBALL PLAYER!"
"That's just an excuse you are making for losing. It's pathetic." Sae said and she glared at him "What the fuck do you mean?"
"You just weren't good enough if quitting for you was that easy. Scouts don't look for players just from the winning team. They observe all the teams and then look for the talent. An individual doesn't have to suffer just because the team isn't doing well."
"Sae... what do you even know about what it feels like to be in the spot? You are a prodigy, you were born with the talent but I wasn't born with the talent of being the best volleyball player. I had to work my ass off only to lose a point because of a stupid ankle twist and lose the whole match. Letting down everyone who believed. Even the fucking audience switched up their support. It felt so lonely in the crowded stadium. So don't just go on rumbling about anything."
"That still doesn't change my opinion. You weren't good enough to survive in the sport, to begin with. It was a dream with no base."
"SAE JUST STOP IT!"
Y/N's voice rose in frustration, her emotions pouring out in a mix of anger and hurt. She couldn't believe that Sae was dismissing her experiences and belittling her efforts. The pain of her past failures resurfaced, and she couldn't hold it back any longer.
"You don't understand what it's like!" Y/N exclaimed, her voice trembling. "You have no idea how hard I worked, how much I sacrificed to be at that level. It's easy for you to judge when you've always been talented. But for me, every success, every opportunity felt like a battle against my own limitations."
She got up on her feet and rushed over to the door "Don't fucking talk to me. Bastard." Y/N's voice cracked with emotion as she stormed towards the door, her frustration and disappointment reaching a boiling point. Sae watched her, his expression a mix of concern and remorse, realizing the gravity of his words and the pain they had caused.
"Y/N, wait," Sae called out, his voice filled with regret but she was already out the door.
"Fuck..."
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