✔︎|Blue Hour (Jaywon ff)

•19•

major(?)TW

Tomorrow's my birthday Jungwon.

I remember him telling me how much he wanted to do something special for me.

He planned on us spending the whole day together.

Maybe we can still can...

I slide on my shoes, grab my phone, and walk downstairs.

I walk past the kitchen, heading for the door.

"Oh, hey Jay. Where are you going? I was just about to make dinner." Mom asks.

"Out. Don't wait for me." I say, walking out the front door.

It was cold, but I didn't care. I walked, letting my feet guide me to wherever they wanted to go.

I walked for what seemed like forever, taking in the nature around me. I didn't even notice where I ended up until I heard the sound of water.

I was at a river.

I walked alongside it until I found a big rock I could sit on. I got myself comfortable, and then just looked out at the water.

The water looked beautiful because of the reflection from the now-setting sun.

It reminded me of that dream I had. The dream I had of us the morning Jungwon died.

I remember how beautiful he looked, even when he was crying.

His last words to me still replay in my mind.

"The sunset is beautiful, isn't it?"

You are, Wonnie. You really are.

Everything makes me miss you more and more.

I miss your laugh, your smile, your adorable dimples, your kisses, your touch, your hugs, and your soft voice.

I miss our little dates, our cuddle sessions, our bake-offs, our inside jokes, our karaoke nights, our long walks, everything.

I miss you.

I want to see you again.

We never got to do the plans we made.

We never got to go to the beach, we never got to go on that trip we wanted to go on when we graduated either.

Maybe we can visit places together still...

It may hurt for a bit, but it'll be worth it to see him again...right?

Before I could do anything, my phone started ringing in my pocket.

I pull it out and look at the called ID.

It was Heeseung.

I sigh, answering the call and putting it on speaker.

"Jay?" Heeseung says.

"Hm?"

"Why are you at the river?"

Shit...I forgot my location was still on.

"Jay, why are you at the river?" He asks again.

"I...I don't know..." I answer.

I hear clicking from the other end of the call, followed by beeping.

"Are you in a car?" I ask.

"Yes, but that's not important right now. What are you doing right now?"

"I'm sitting on a rock by the water." I say.

"Don't move, and don't do anything, okay?" He says.

"Okay..."

And with that, Heeseung hangs up.

I put my phone back in my pocket, staring out at the water again.

Not even 2 minutes later, I heard someone calling my name.

I turn around and see Heeseung running towards me.

"Jay! Oh, thank god!" He says, tightly wrapping his arms around me.

"Why are you even here Jay? What were you gonna do?" He asks.

"I..." I start, feeling the tears start to pool in my eyes. "I miss him...I miss him so much."

"I know you do Jay, we all do..."

"I can't keep living like this Hee...I can't live without him..." I cry.

"It's okay, but you can't do this. It would break Jungwon if he saw you like this." Heeseung says, rubbing my back. "Come on, let me take you to my house. It's too cold for you to be out here in just a t-shirt and jeans."

"Okay..." I nod, wiping my tears.

...

If Heeseung hadn't come and talked to me that night, I would've jumped into that river.

I almost ended it all, just so I could see you again.

Heeseung helped me realize that that wouldn't have been something you wanted.

He saved me from doing something I would forever regret.

༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅༅

Only one more chapter...omg

also Wattpad decided to be a little bitch and suspend my account for a few days because i said K¥$. that's literally all I said... so yeah, I wasn't able to post or do ANYTHING.

also yes i did change the title. I think blue hour fits the story more than butterfly...

anyways

have an amazing day/night and Happy Pride Month!