Balance: Benedict Bridgerton's Tale

Chapter 17: Destruction

Welp.. I meant to post this chapter like two three months ago, not 5 months later. I aplogise. I intend to finish this story though hopefully around August or something.. probably. There will probably be another time jump in the new chapter or not. I hope I will be able to finally explore Benedict's and Eleanor's strained relationship. And lastly I would like to say two no three things. 1. As always sorry for shitty Grammar. 2. It is past 3 over here, that is why I do not write often because it is so time consuming, also I because I start too many new fics and 3. I am sorry about something in this chapter but.. what will happen has always been the outcome I had in my mind. 4 (yeah another point). I do NOT reread my fics as I cringe so sorry for any repeat dialogue in previous chapters.

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Heavenly. Benedict couldn't describe it any other way. Feeling her in his arms, his lips pressed to hers, being allowed to kiss her completely senseless, it was the most wonderful feeling he had had in years. She was hesitant at first in her response to the kiss but soon she too was lost in the sensation, that insurmountable feeling that this was how it should be, her in his arms, as if her body was made for him and vice versa, fitting like a glove.

Not breaking contact with her he traces her collarbone with his hand, revelling in the sensation of her skin but his fingers want to explore more and move downwards. Carefully, very carefully as if Benedict didn't want to startle her, he slides his palm over her right breast and palms her. It makes him lose control and a moment later he is touching everywhere, starting with cupping both of her breasts. The sensation is too much for both to handle, he feels himself shaking and she too shudders, but it isn't enough for Benedict's as he wishes to feel more and more. One hand reaches for her back where he starts to stroke her gently, up, and down before giving up all pretence of going slow and grabbing her behind and pushing her body even closer.

He wants her now, this second, all of her but when he reaches for the lower region of her dress and pushes it upwards, she breaks away with a sharp pull and retreats, talking a few steps away from him. She backs away to a nearby wall and stays there, remaining just as out of breath as he did.

"We can't do this" is the only thing she says.

Benedict lets out an oath so foul his mother would have slapped him upside the head twice if she had heard it. It takes him a while to composed himself, not an easy task and it took him several times going through his hair, something he usually did out of nervousness, to calm himself. When he was ready to face her he found her still standing against the wall, trying as hard to calm herself as he had done.

She looks distraught, very distraught and he hates seeing her like this.

"Alina..." he begins.

"What have I done?"

"Alina. Please..-."

"My God, what did I do?" she repeated, this time her voice seemed equally more pinched.

"Nothing wrong my love. You haven't done anything wrong" he replied in a soothing tone. She was close to crying he saw, and all Benedict wanted was to comfort her, to take her in his arms and tell her it would be all right again.

Benedict takes in her direction, but she moves away from him and is unwilling to glance in his direction..

""Look at me," he says gently but she doesn't comply. "Look at me Alina."

She does and it is a mistake because he is gazing at her with such an endearing expression that it makes her melt.

He on the other hand can't help himself and shortens the distance between them, wishing to get nearer. His wish is granted as he is soon standing in close vicinity of Alina once more.