Balance: Benedict Bridgerton's Tale

Chapter 11: Inescapable

"I can't marry you, Tommy... I'm sorry" she said as she lowered her head.

"I beg your pardon?" he asked her unhappily as he understood to what she was referring to. Initially, he had been pleased to spend time with her but her facial expression indicated that the reason for this meeting would be less pleasant.

Oh God. She was the greatest shrew on earth.

It was busy in the little tea shop where they had arranged to meet, so it was not the best place to meet, but on the other hand it did not seem appropriate to her to go to the Watson's bakery and tell him so.

"Why not?" he asked her after a few moments of silence. Why not? How could she answer that? Because I'm in love with someone else, because no matter how many times I try not to think about him I still do. Because I haven't been honest with you and it's not like me at all to be like that; so sneaky; so, lying. Because I can't lie to you any longer...

But she remained silent and could not answer. He took a deep breath and addressed her while she was still admiring her worn-out shoes, which she would have to replace one of these days.

"There's someone else, isn't there? " he asked. At that statement she looked at him with wide eyes; of course, the correct conclusion was the one he could draw but even then she felt caught somewhere. She was unable to answer but at the same time her face spoke volumes. When she had finally composed herself she only nodded; briefly and turned her face away from him just after that.

"There was someone yes." She felt Tommy's gaze burn on her, but he said nothing for a small while.

"Was?"; he asked with raised eyebrows.

"I'm not in touch with him anymore" she replied.

"So, who is he if I may ask?" Tommy wanted to know, his tone a bit snappy.

"I can't tell you" she replied shaking her head.

"Why? Because you need to protect him?" asked Tommy irritated.

"No, that's not it, believe me -" but even before she could finish the sentence he interrupted her.

"You sure about that? I personally don't think you should protect someone like him. Let me guess, Alina... Upper-class jerk who promised you all sorts of things but then dropped you like a stone after he.. got want he wanted, am I right?"

A few heads turned in their direction to her embarrassment, and a few people now seemed to be intently following the conversation.

"Let's go outside" said Tommy as he stood up, emptied his cup of tea, and headed towards the till to pay. Then he walked back to Alina, and they left together.

It was a cold but sunny day. They had gone to the harbour and walked along the non-industrial part of it, looking out at the ships, well especially Alina, who was still very embarrassed. They walked in silence... too full of thought to talk; until Tommy spoke up again.

"You don't have to tell me his identity if you don't want to. However, I would like you to explain it to me, Alina. I don't want to say I'm entitled to that, but it would give me the opportunity to understand"; he said his voice a little softer this time.

"He... I don't believe he had any intention of using me.... He wasn't like that" she began, with a weak argument because it probably seemed in Tommy's eyes that this was the classic story of the rich son who abuses his 'lesser' in society.. And she understood why he would think so; she would have thought so too... but Benedict was not like that. Was he?

"Oh, come on Alina" cried Tommy now annoyed again.

"Don't you think I know his kind. Do you think you're the first naive woman to fall for the charms of a rich man who promises you all sorts of things so that you want to jump into-"?