34. Happy Tears

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It was hard explaining to Kaida why Alisha wasnt growing a baby anymore. Losing a baby didnt make sense to her. 

"Can't you find it again?" Kaida would countered. They all knew that Alisha wasnt feeling well when she didnt come out to make breakfast, three days in a row. That was unheard of. 

Aegon knew he had to do something to make her feel better. He didnt know how to cook but he enlisted his siblings and Laenor to help. 

"You eat the most, you should know how to cook." Aegon was telling Laenor when Viserys came in. 

"When I heard pots and pans I thought Ali was out of bed." Viserys remarked. 

"We are cooking her breakfast to make her feel better." Aemond corrected. 

"I think she will like that." Viserys agreed. "Can I help?"

Alisha couldnt find the strength to get out of bed. She read stories and did bath time with Kaida but she couldnt face the court. When you were the queen everyone knew your business. She didnt want their sympathy and dirty looks. She already knew she was a failure, she didnt need them rubbing it in. 

Aemond came in and gave her snuggles the first night, Helaena was very confused and offered her a butterfly which promptly flew around the room once she opened her hands before it found its way out the window. Alisha enjoyed the thought all the same. Aegon was the eldest and he felt like he needed to be responsible. Responsible for his siblings and the kingdom while his mother was in bed. But he was only 12, almost 13 he didnt know what to do, he knew that when they werent feeling well, their mother would cook for them so thats what he wanted to do for her. 

Alisha read her faith of the seven book, staring down uselessly at the words. Who was she to pray to for all her sins? Was this the price of her lies? Losing a child? After all this time? 

"Mum?" Aegon questioned opening the door. "Oh good shes up, bring it in." Aegon whispered looking back into the hall. 

"What's going on?" Alisha questioned tossing her book aside. 

"We know you arent feeling well." Aemond remarked. 

"And I had the idea to make you breakfast." Aegon agreed. Helaena put the tray down. 

"So WE made you breakfast." Helaena agreed. "All of us." 

"I made a face on the pancakes." Kaida remarked touching the blueberry smile. 

"Thats lovely." Alisha agreed. "Thank you all so much." 

"So you feel better now?" Aegon questioned offering her a glass of juice. "Oranges, you said fresh squeezed juice and warm baths fix everything." Aegon looked back at the bath. "Do you need a bath? Someone make mother a bath!" Aegon shouted out. 

"Thank you, thank you, all of you. This is so sweet, I have the best children ever." It made her cry more. 

"I think we upset her." Aegon whispered. "What did you do?"

"Me? I'm just sitting here." Aemond corrected. 

"Do something!" Aegon countered and Aemond hugged her. 

"I'm not sad," Alisha assured as she held onto Aemond. Kaida popped a blueberry in her mouth as she settled between Alisha's legs. helaena hugged Alisha too and she couldnt get the tears to stop. 

"Why are you crying mama?" kaida countered. "I cry when I'm sad or hurt." she clarified. 

"These are my kids are the best happy tears." Alisha remarked. "Thank you for being the best."

"So you like breakfast?" Aegon needed confirmation. 

"I love you, I love it, I am so grateful for all of you and your hard work... I'm proud of you." Alisha remarked wiping at her eyes. She reached out for Aegon and he held onto her. 

"I did good?"

"You did great." Alisha agreed. 

"Stop crying then because I'm confused on happy tears." Aegon whispered in her ear and she choked out a laugh. 

"Sorry." Alisha agreed blinking away her tears. Aegon sat beside her and she tipped her head into him. "Viserys we have the best kids in the world." 

"We do." Viserys agreed. 

"Dont let the tears fool you, she is happy." Aegon confirmed. 

"Women are complex creatures." helaena remarked. "We can't it our emotional rage is vast and wide like the ocean." 

"Crying usually means sad, how am I supposed to know happy tears are a thing?" Aegon countered. 

"Are you okay my love?" Viserys whispered kissing Alisha's temple. 

"I am now."

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