Not Just Another Teen Romance

Chapter 9 ~Scarletts POV~

It was inevitable, a feeling I couldn't escape. As he opened his eyes and rolled over, grasping me into his tight embrace. I closed my eyes, his warmth keeping me in his capture.

I didn't want it to end. I wanted to stay like that forever. But as he groggily realized what he'd done and tried to undo it I again felt a loss. He rose from the bed, leaving me to fend for myself for the comfort he'd offered.

I pretended to be asleep, ignoring his embarrassed physic. The red flushed expression he wore making it obvious he didn't like it as much as I did.

He left the room, silent emptiness filling the now vacant room. I took a moment to conjure up my thoughts before myself getting out of the bed.

I walked to the bathroom and splashed my face with cold water.

What is happening? Why did I like it when he was holding me? No.

I looked through the mirror to see my reflection. But what I saw wasn't me. It was someone else. It wasn't the happy joyful girl I used to be. The girl who didn't care about what she looked like. The girl who wore a permanent smile. It wasnt me. And when I watched Seth enter the room through the glass I felt my heart drop.

This wasn't me. Not since Brandon. Not since the breakdown. I hadn't been myself in over ten years. The pressure of being what everyone accepted was what I'd become.

Buying the new trends. Saying the new slang. Laughing at the new jokes. I used to think for myself. But then i lost myself. Unable to find my way back to where I was before.

It was all just a bit of a blur too me. As the first tear trickled down my cheek I felt a release. Almost a sigh of relief. I'd let go. I'd forget.

Seth approached but I didn't notice. I was too deep in thought. Preoccupied with my own issues to feel his arms wrap around my waist. His chin resting on my shoulder.

I buried my face in my hands. Letting the tears pour. Allowing myself to break down. I'd been holding it all in. Ignoring the aching pain I'd been trying to ignore. I slide down to the floor , along with Seth.

I'd filled the guilt and hate with materialistic items. Boyfriends who only hurt me. And the one thing I'd never admit to. It was too much.

Too dark of a place to realise how reckless I'd become until the healed wounds scarred. And the evidence was evident.

It was unbearable. The pain. The hurt. The loss. It was too much. It controlled me. And when I thought maybe Brandon would help I jumped at the chance. To only be crushed along this heart wrenching journey I'd been trying to end for the last decade.

As I cried Seth held me. No words just silent cries from me.

What I didn't want to admit to myself was how good it felt to be in his arms. I never felt so safe with Brandon.

I liked him. I liked Seth.

It was a ridiculous assumption considering we met two days ago but the solution was obvious and I knew it. How could I deny the way he made me feel? How could I deny the comfort and want I had for him?

"Come on sweetheart, lets go back to bed." He whispered in my ear. His hot breath sending a rush of goosebumps down my arms. He unwrapped his arms -a feeling I didn't like very much-and reached his hand out to me, I took it, he led me to the bed. Slipping back the duvet.

Motioning for me to climb in first and then he followed. We lay facing each other. He brushed a piece of hair from my face and pushed it back behind my ear, rubbing my cheek to rid it from the damned tears.

"Why so sad, love?" He barely whispers. I feel a sense of guilt as I admire him. As I compare him. I couldn't appreciate the beautiful boy with in kissing distance without thinking about brandon.

And it was almost an uncontrollable feeling. The thoughts popping up in my head without my permission. But I was soon to realise their wasn't a thing I could to to stop them. They were there and I was to ignore them.

I closed my eyes and pursed my lips. How was I to explain to him my jumbled thoughts? My mother? My outcast appeal towards myself? Brandon? It wasn't exactly an opening conversation. So I decide to change the subject.

"How did you sleep?" He gives an apprehensive expression before quickly replying. "I slept fine Scarlett. Why were you crying?"

"Why is that your business?" I retort with a hint of annoyance in my tone. "I guess it isn't." He explains with an understanding glare.

"That's what I thought." I hiss back before climbing out of the bed and exiting the room.

So the situation could have been handled much more maturely but how else would I have gotten him off my back? It honestly wasn't his business so I felt the accusation was true.

That ends that awkward conversation. I made my way to the kitchen, the loud rumble of my stomach making it obvious of my lack if food digested in the last 12 hours.

But then I remember that we hadn't had time to go grocery shopping and the only possible thing to be kept in a rental cottage would be peanut butter.

I groan and walk back towards my room to dress. In the process I hear a squeak, probably Seth. When I'm finished I walk out to find him eating peanut butter with a spoon on the couch while watching Spongebob on the telly.

And this kid is 18? Whatever. I walk up to him, his smacking of the peanut butter and the telly making it almost impossible for me not to have to raise my voice. "Seth?"

He abruptly turns his head in my direction. His top lip drenched in the sticky substance. "I'm going grocery shopping. Can I have the car keys?"

He points to the kitchen counter and turns to return to his childish cartoons. I groan and grab the keys, slipping into my jacket before exiting the house.

I enter the grocery store to find myself completely unaware of what we need, and where they stock it. No one seems to notice my confused wandering so I continue to look through the aisles.

Grabbing whatever might be of use to eat or cook. As I approach the check out, the tall broad woman behind the counter greats me with a wide grin.

"Hello ma'am . Welcome to Trader Joes, how can I help you today?" The words come out almost robotic, making it clear she was required to practice the line over and over.

I return the smile and place the basket of food objects on the moving counter thing. I don't fucking know what it's called. She scans my items and I exit the shop.

A sigh of relief escapes my breath. We now have food. Now to concentrate on the awkward sexual tension we seem to be coming across lately.

I get in the car and noticed the low gas icon is flashing red. Fuck! This doesn't make today any better, and right when I felt like there was nothing else to do but curl up on the couch and chow down on some pretzels and Nutella.

I started the car and drove towards the cottage

So there's part two!! There is a few more parts to come so stay tuned!!