the pieces within

✨Aurora ✨

I was in sleep but i could hear the bell ringing. I couldn't get up tho cuz i wasn't awake . The sound of bell ringing became a part of my dream. And i slowly stopped hearing it. After some time my surroundings were filled with a sweet and tempting aroma. I was so tired because of sleeping that it was hard to get up from bed. I still managed to do so. I opened the door and yawned. I held a pillow looking outside i felt im at someone else's house. Everything was sorted and clean. Then a glass of water appeared before me. I turned and saw EZ standing there with a tray in his hands. I didn't bothered to ask how he got in and just stared at his shirtless upper body barely covered with my apron that he wore. The apron was just hanging around his neck as it was impossible to tie it on him. I was literally half of his size. It was swinging sideways and i couldn't help but supressy laugh and ask him,

"So desperate to wear an apron for me huh!"

"Like what you see? darling."

he also questioned me playfully.

I passed him a blanket saying

"Aren't you cold? C'mon cover up.", as i took notice of rain outside. I wanted to hug him. He always clears my mess that's the least i could do.

So i just wrapped my arms around him saying,
"Thankyou so much EZ and im sorry too for making you do this."

"Its pouring rain. Why are you here?"

I asked softly dwelling in the moment.

" i think you need time away from me.. im sorry Rory."

I closed the non existing distance between us hugging him even more closely
" Don't. Don't leave me now. I still need you." I snuggled in his bare chest.

"i love you, Rory.", he said and i got hit with reality that he loves me. Atleast that's what he's been telling me. But love is a strong word and i couldn't give him what he wanted, needed and desired. From the day we met i knew I'd end up hurting him. I hurt people that's all I'm good at.

"You shouldn't." i replied and headed back to my bed. Too tired to argue. After a few minutes he knocked and he entered holding the same tray. He fed me the toast that he made. They.were.heavenly. I cursed myself internally for being cold and not appreciating his gesture. But i didn't speak a word nor did he. I was about to lay down and sleep when a question popped in my mind.

Where will he sleep? Never ever on couch. His whole body will ache the next day. I had no choice but to ask him to sleep beside me knowing damn well it'll be special for him but he will be hurt later upon realisation that it meant nothing for me.

"Dont sleep on couch its way too small for you and your ass. You can sleep beside me in a separate blanket." I told him.

"I'd be fine on the couch don't worry and I'll probably head home", he said.

"Yeah! Can't sleep beside me. Its okay if you aren't comfortable. Shall i sleep on couch?" I asked taking note of rain outside that won't let him go home at this hour.

He said he wasn't sleepy. Whatever good for you i thought. And even after doing absolutely nothing but sleep for the whole day like a sloth my eyelids were once again heavy.

"Stay."

"Okay.", Was the last thing i heard him telling me.

**************
I shuffled from left to right a few times. I tossed everything away. My body paralysed . My breathing uneven. That's when i saw SADDIE, my bestfriend. We both were laughing our asses off at our coaching centre, a few days to go for our finals.

I was walking on my terrace. Ongoing call with Saddie and another friend. I was arguing.
It was even harder to breathe now.

"You always sound so rude and tight huh!
So what! Yeah she didn't said that i did. Its okay Rory. Be chill about it. We are best friends", Saddie said to me.

I sensed tears welling up in my eyes. I was wrathful at this point and i woke up suddenly with a slight shock. Reality hit me. I'm in NY not in India anymore.

Immediately i felt warmth against my back and arms around spooning me. I recognised him. I tried to calm my shaky breaths that almost sounded like sobs but weren't.

I opened my eyes slowly. His soft raspy voice echoing in my head
"Shh!! Don't you dare think you are alone. Im right here."

I turned to face him deeply inhaling in his comforting pheromones.

"Its okay to cry sometimes. Its okay. Don't give yourself a hard time." he said pecking my forehead, cupping my face.

"I don't do cry. My tears dried up long before i met you and soon enough when he left me toyed with. When i did something terrible and ended up getting it back to me. And when she crossed a line. I feel sorry for myself.. that somewhere along the way i cared. " I scoffed.

"Who?" he asked.

"Them."

"You collect scars because you want proof that you are paying for whatever sins you have committed. But you can't hold onto them forever. You need to let go. Those aren't your sins only. Those aren't even sins.", He said.

"Even though they say that time heals all wounds. My scars are still fucking there. They dont hurt anymore. Im not holding onto them but I can't forget what happened. I can't forget how i felt. " I finished.

We had premade our plans for this weekend. I would have stayed home if it wasn't for EZ.
He went back to his place to get ready for work.

After he left, the silence that surrounded me was the loudest sound i ever heard.